Ateez Roommates - Seongjoong

You're not fighting alone anymore

**tw: this chapter discusses domestic abuse and homophobia/coming out stories

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"So, you remember when I would go on night drives?"

"Yeah, to destress?"

"Yeah. Well, they weren't really great at that, were they?"

"No."

"That was when my dad would call. He always called to check on my grades, go over my latest test scores, yell at me if I wasn't doing well."

"That's so controlling! You're in college!"

"He just wanted to make sure I was staying on-track."

"No, he was making sure you were following his plan."

"I realize that, but I know he's been through the system and he knows how to succeed. So I would always pick up because he knows what's best."

Hongjoong sighed and shook his head, unable to believe how awful that must have been.

"Anyways, he would also ask me about you. He was worried that your 'laziness' would wear off on me."

"My what!?" Hongjoong flared but Seonghwa waved a hand for him to calm down.

"My father has always disliked anyone who follows a creative career. I think it stems from my mom."

Hongjoong stayed quiet, listening.

"She wanted to be a singer and she was really good. But she gave it up at first when she married my father and had children. It was always her biggest regret so when I was in elementary and middle school she encouraged me to get involved in musicals and choir."

Hongjoong scoffed but covered his mouth.

"I'm sorry—you were in musicals!? And choir?"

"Yeah. And—I really liked it. But it wasn't enough for her. She needed to follow her dreams, so she told my dad she wanted to try again. He laughed at her and told her to give up already. She didn't take it well and that was when they really began to fight."

Seonghwa wiped a tear from his eye quickly, not trying to get emotional.

"By the time I was in high school she left. My dad forced me to quit and told me I needed to think realistically. So ever since, I've just listened to him. My younger brother was interested in music too but I didn't want him to get hurt like I did so I protected him."

Hongjoong gasped.

"You mean—he—"

"Yes. He was abusive."

Hongjoong reached out a hand and held Seonghwa's. Seonghwa wanted to make him let go but the gesture felt nice so he let him.

"I know it's stupid that I still do everything he asks but I'm worried about my brother. He's living with him all alone and I can't do anything to help. So as long as I'm here and doing my best, my dad is distracted. But if I mess up, he'll take it out on him."

Hongjoong felt a tear roll down his own cheek and wiped another off of Seonghwa's.

"Hwa, I don't know what to say. I'm so sorry. I must have made your life a fucking nightmare and you were finally getting a break from him—"

"It's not your fault. I was horrible to you. You had every right to be awful to me. I deserved all of it."

"No you didn't. You didn't deserve any of it."