CURRENTLY BEING REWRITTEN!!!
I am keeping up the original chapters of this book for now but it is currently being rewritten. I fell out of love with this book and decided I needed to completely switch it up. The book that I plan on writing after thi...
My face goes red when Fin says that. I push my face into his chest and nod my head. He laughs and pulls my face up to look at him.
After a short make-out session, we fall asleep. It was a good night's rest. Nothing woke me up... Well, one thing did. Coffee! I get up and walk into the kitchen where Fin is sitting at the island drinking coffee. Except for the fact that another person is sitting there. I run quietly back to the bedroom and get myself ready.
I hear the mystery person ask who was here. Fin told them that I was his girlfriend. No, I didn't swoon at that. You horny effers. I go put into the kitchen a few minutes later and Fin calls me over.
"Ivy, this is Sam. He's visiting from Seattle. Sam, this is Ivy."
"Hi, Sam." I slightly wave at him. He nods his head in acknowledgment. I get a cup of coffee and sit down next to the boys. "How long will you be here?" I ask quietly. Sam just looks at me and then back down at his coffee.
"He's not sure for right now."
"Okay, " I nod my head, "I'm gonna go see my mom, I'll probably be back later." I tell Fin. We say our goodbyes and I head over to moms.
𝟻... 𝟻 𝚑𝚘𝚞𝚛𝚜... 𝟻 𝚑𝚘𝚞𝚛𝚜 𝚕𝚊𝚝𝚎𝚛...
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(Ivy's Outfit)
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(System's Outfit)
I get a text from Fin that they are at the baseball field at the park downtown. I hope in my car and head to the field.
I find Fin and Sam sitting in the grass at the far end of the field, I walk over towards them. Sam sees me but Fin doesn't. Sam winks at me and turns back to Fin.
"I can't believe you picked this slut, God." Sam scoffs. Fin looks over towards me, I'm a good 10 steps away. I clench my jaw and decide to be the bigger person and walk away.
I feel a hand wrap around my arm, and turn me around. My eyes meet the systems, it's definitely Salem. She pulls me in for a hug and I let her hold me. I can hear Sam laughing, I feel like people are staring at me, I can't breathe, I want out, I need out. Dammit, I need out.
I push Salem away and run to my car. I start it up and drive to mom's house. I wake up in my car, it's dark, my car is parked in the driveway, ignition is off. Shit, I had another panic attack. I get out of the car and go into the house. I head up to my room and get in bed just to wake up in the morning drenched in sweat and completely unable to breathe. I pick up a book from my nightstand and throw it at the door. I pass out again.
I wake up a few hours later in the ER. Mom tells me that Fin is on his way. I'm hooked up to oxygen. I'm told that I had a severe panic attack and that they wanted to check me out. I tell mom to not let Fin in, she refuses to listen. After a few minutes of us arguing she leaves the room and Fin comes in. I roll my eyes and huff.
Without saying anything, he sits on the bed next to me and starts playing with my hair. I don't look at him, instead I'm childish and cross my arms over my chest. He mutters something under his breath but I don't fully hear it.
"Ivy?" Fin whispers in my ear. I shiver and he wraps hit arm around me. "Ivy, please. Please listen to me. What Sam said was to try to get a rise out of me. He's always been like this and he always will be. I gave him a peace of my mind," I look at him, he has tears running down his face, "he won't do it again. I promise you Ivory, I promise you."
"Ok." I say in a low voice. Watching him cry hurts me, it makes me want to cry and scream to see him in pain. Is this my doing? Did I hurt him? God, I'm so fucking stupid. What the hell is wrong with me?
I lay my head back on the pillow and start laughing as hot, heavy tears start flowing. I can't stop. I don't want to stop. I look over at Fin as he wipes away my tears.
"I'm such a fucking failure, I don't deserve you. You should just leave and find someone better than me. Someone that isn't broken or riddled with horrible fucking trauma that's incredibly stupid. Like, who the hell has fucking panic attacks about their dad that left them when they were three, or, or the fact that I'm so fucking pathetic that I couldn't stand up for myself and got myself raped. I fucking deserve all of it, all of it." By the end of my rant I realize that I'm staring at the ceiling, no longer laughing but bawling.
I feel Fin grab my face gently. He picks me up and scoots into the middle of the bed. He puts me in his lap and cradles me like a baby. He lets me cry. He holds me and tells me that I'm okay, that it's not my fault, that I'm not a failure, that I'm not pathetic. He reassures me that I'm perfect, even though I'm damaged.
"I'm never going to leave you Ivy, I couldn't do that. Tu me rends heureux et je t'adore, je ne veux plus jamais te quitter. S'il te plaît, ne me quitte pas, je t'aime trop pour que l'un de nous parte. (You make me happy and I adore you, I never want to leave you. Please don't leave me, I love you too much for either one of us to leave.)" I look up at him and my tears start to subside.
"Je t'aime aussi, Fin. Je t'aime plus que tout. (I love you too, Fin. I love you more than anything.)" he leans down and kisses me. It's soft and gentle but holds so much lust and want. I break the kiss and rest my head on his chest. Fin kisses the top of my head.
The doctor comes in and discharges me a few minutes later. I told my mom that I'm going to go stay at Fin's for the rest of the night and day. We get in the car and head to Fin's house, he tells me that Sam went and got a hotel room, that he won't be staying at the house. I'm actually kinda happy about that.
𒊹︎𒊹︎𒊹︎ Next chapter is on it's way! Cactus means thou leavest not.
