Too Many Chances

Chapter Fourteen

The following day I woke up early, did the house chores and went outside for a breeze. The compound reminded me of Maxwell. I  sat in the compound and memories of Maxwell whirled in my mind. I stood up quickly and paced about.

My eyes stopped at the spot where Maxwell had sat when he and his friends had visited me the last time. We had spent a lot of time sitting there, chatting and playing games. I fought back the tears threatening to fall.
   
Am such a fool for missing you, Max, I thought. Am such a big fool.
   
I tensed as I felt a hand on my waist.

"Max. You've come back to me," I murmured and turned around happily. "You?" I stepped back.

"Yes, it's me," William said with a grin.

"What are you doing here?"

"Visiting, of course," replied William with a smile. "Can't I visit my best friend?"

"Of course, you can. I am sorry."

"It's okay. I heard what happened. I am sorry things turned out this way."

"What are you talking about?"

"I'm talking about Max. You don't have to hide it anymore. I know what happened."

"How did you know? I neither told you nor Anita."

"That's what hurts me. I am your best friend but you never tell me anything. I am always the last one to find out what happens to you. Anita told me after Erick informed her about it."

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you." I gave William an apologetic look. "I didn't want you to have another fight with Max. He is your friend, after all."

"And you are my best friend." William took my hands in his. "How could he do this to you?" He paused, "Scratch that. Of course, he could. He has no conscience. That's why I asked you to break up with him before."

"I am sorry, Will. I should have listened to you. You are my best friend. You would never do anything to hurt me."

William embraced me. "Max is a fool. He doesn't deserve you. You should be with someone who loves you unconditionally."

"You're right."

"Sofia, am right here," William said when we drew apart. "I love you so much. I'll never leave you."

"I know, Will. I'm so lucky to have you in my life."

"Then be with me." William held my face in his hands. "Be my girlfriend."
I removed his hands from my face.

"What?"

"You're no longer with Max. Be my girlfriend."
  
"I can't, Will. I-"

"Still love Max? Do you think he's crying over you right now? He is already with someone else."
 
William had a point. Maxwell had moved on. He definitely wasn't thinking of me.

That doesn't mean I have to say yes to another man, I mused. I should move on too, but I can't. I still love Max. I can't be with any other man.

"I can't," I repeated. "I'm not ready."
  
"It's okay. I understand."
 
You don't, I thought. Nobody understands what am going through. I want Max but every time I get him I push him away. I don't want to get close to him then end up getting hurt. I want to protect my heart but by doing so am hurting myself anyway.

"You don't have to give me an answer right away. Take your time."

"Will, you don't understand."

"I do. I understand you perfectly well. You need time to get over him. I won't rush you, I promise."

How could I explain it to him that I didn't love him the way he loved me? He would always be my best friend and nothing more.

Anita came soon after her brother left.

"I am sorry," she said and enveloped me in a hug.

"Thanks. I'll be okay," I told her.

"Yes, you would," she agreed. "You're strong."

I forced a smile. "How are you and Erick?"

Ever since we confirmed that Anita wasn't pregnant, Erick had been calling frequently. I couldn't find the guts to tell my friend that he wasn't the right man for her.

"We're good," replied Anita.

"Really?"

"Yeah."

"That's good."

"Yeah. I have to go home now."

"What? You're leaving already? But you just got here."

"I'll be back later in the afternoon. We're going out."

"We are?"

"Yes. Didn't Jamila tell you?"

"No, she didn't. Where are we going?"

"To the beach."

"Oh, great."

I bade Anita goodbye and went back inside. Jamila and Christine were having breakfast. We chatted for a while then watched a movie before making lunch.

In the afternoon, Jamila, Christine, Anita, William and I left for the beach. I sat on the sea shore and watched my friends as they swam. I wasn't fond of swimming.

William came to join me a few minutes later. We had a light conversation. He sat with me until the others came out of the water. We had snacks then played volleyball. It was fun. I was able to forget about Maxwell for a while.

The following day, I went to see Donald. It was stupid of me to visit him, but I did it anyway. I knocked on the door and he opened it quickly. He did not smile upon seeing me.

"Hi," I greeted.

"Hi," he replied. "What are you doing here?"

"I...I came to see you."

"Oh."

"Can we talk?"

"Now is not a good time."

"Who is it, honey?" A familiar voice asked from inside.

"It's a friend," Donald replied.

"I didn't know you had company," I said, feeling a pang of jealousy.

What is wrong with me? I wondered. I was the one who ended things with Don so why do I feel this way?

"Could you introduce me-" the lady stopped midsentence. "Sofia!"

I looked at my friend surprisingly.

"Anita! What are you doing here?"

"I am visiting my boyfriend. What about you? How do you know Donald?"

It felt like the incident at Maxwell's place was replaying itself right here.

I have lost Max, I thought. I have lost Don as well. I have no one.

"Sofia?"

Anita's voice jolted me back to the present.

"I...I..."

"She's a friend of mine," replied Donald. "We were colleagues sometime back."

"Oh."

"Sorry for interrupting you two. I'll leave now," I told them.

"Goodbye, Sofia," said Donald.

"Goodbye," I said and quickly left.

I only have two choices, I realized on my way home. Either fight for Maxwell or give up and move on.

The latter was a more difficult choice.