! yr spoilers !
" thank you, simon"
wilhelm's last words to him before christmas break.
this had proven to simon that it does, in fact, take a fool to remain sane.
! i do not own any young royals characters !
! this is just my idea of what will hap...
the short walk to math barely gave me any time to breathe. as soon as he touched me i was flooded with emotion. feelings i convinced myself i never wanted back. feelings i've spent two weeks trying to push away. feelings that were twice as strong as they were the first time. i don't know how to handle this, but i do know i can't get any more attached. breaking my own heart is one thing, but him breaking me is something completely different. i feel like i'm no longer in control of this situation.
i arrived at the classroom five minutes early, and i was the first person there. i'm hoping i didn't walk too fast for someone to notice something was up. new rumors were the last thing i needed. people slowly started filling up the room until there was just one seat left. it was wilhelm's. as long as he made it within two minutes he would be fine.
as if on cue, he walked into the room. everyone's head turned to him. i felt bad. he avoided making eye contact with anyone but me. he walked behind the table sara and i were sitting at. when he passed the back of my seat he dropped a small slip of paper into my lap. i was thrown off. i got flashbacks back to the morning after... when he dropped breakfast into my arms. things were okay then. we were good then. i miss that.
i unfolded the paper and read the note:
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i knew it was coming. i was expecting he would want to talk it out. i just didn't think it would be so soon. though, i guess it's better to get it out of the way sooner than later. it leaves less time to wait for the hurt.
i looked his way and saw him staring back at me. i nodded, and he nodded back to show his understanding. at that moment, the teacher entered the room. we all stood and greeted him. within two minutes, we were flipped to page 302 of our textbooks and class was starting.
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the rest of the morning was relatively uneventful. math went fine, and then we had ethics. ethics is my least favorite class at hillerska because all of the rich kids complained about money. can you sense the irony in that? but, aside from that, it was good. sometimes i would look in wilhelm's direction and realize he was staring at me. he would smile back, but unlike yesterday, i got butterflies. i hate the effect he has on me. it's so weird that he can make me feel like this.
after ethics, i have a free period. i usually use it to do my homework, but i couldn't focus today. right as the bell rang i ran out of the classroom and locked myself in my room. i fell down onto my bed, closed my eyes, and breathed. i needed to be calm when i talked to him. i sat like that, looking the note over in my head. every curve of every letter, every dot from the pen that didn't make a letter. i don't know why i did it. i don't know why i had memorize every intricate detail, but it was like a burning obsession.
then, after a very short 45 minutes, the bell rang. so i slowly got out of bed and walked over to my door. i picked up my backpack and left.
