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25

Seungkwan's body was frozen, unwilling to move, but the only thought running through his mind was 'leave before someone sees you're, so that's what he did.

He had left hurriedly because he didn't want Hansol to wait for him, but when he was running down the stairs, he realised, while he busied himself with aiding Mingyu's cut he had left his wallet in the washroom and had forgotten it there, now if he wanted to buy something for himself, since he was going to a mall afterall, so he quickly made his way back to his shared apartment and pulled his key, unlocking the door quitely, he was about to remove his shoes and walk inside when he heard Wonwoo hyung talking about Him and Mingyu, that got him curious, thus he continued to listen, regretting it minutes after.

Seungkwan left as quitely as he had entered, pacing his way downstairs once again, but this time his heart heavier than it was before.

He quitely walked towards the back of their apartment building, that was the most amount of privacy he could get at the moment.

The older's confession surprised him, he was confused, he felt like breaking down right then and there, and the most annoying part was he didn't know why he had this feeling or sudden urge to cry.

What did he expect?

He expected so much more though, he realised as he let his first tear slid down his cheek.

"Stop", Seungkwan heard his loud voice echo, "Stop being a fucking crybaby", his voice was softer now, "Stop so people don't have to make promises to take care of you", this time, his voice was only for himself, below a whisper.

"Why?", He questioned himself, as his single tear was now replaced by the many fresh tears which kept streaming down his cheeks, even after his continual efforts to stop them.

He didn't know that the older was being nice to him because of his hyung, he thought that they had a genuine friendship that he himself  had build, but he was so wrong.

At this point he didn't even want to think about the small amount of feelings his stupid self had developed towards the older, the feelings which left him feeling all giddy and grateful towards the older, the feelings which kept reoccurring when Mingyu went out of his for Seungkwan, he thought that meant something, apparently it did not.

"Boo Seungkwan stop being pathetic", He told himself as he tried to wipe away his tears, a mocking laugh leaving his mouth when more tears replaced the older ones.

"Stop", he said again, his teeth gritted.

"Get your shit together, Hansol is waiting", he tried explaining the most obvious thing to himself, stressing each word.

He took a deep breath, which didn't help at all, making him take another deeper breath, then another, and soon enough he was calm enough to resume his walking.

"It's okay, you don't know what you are supposed to do now and that's okay", he said as he tried to calm down the thousands thoughts raging through his mind.

He was walking towards the mall, talking to his own self, yes he has officially lost his last brain cell.

"You can just pretend you never heard anything", he continued as he nodded his head.

"I'm crazy", he exclaimed as his fingers found their way to his head, pulling his strands of hair in frustration.

"Seungkwan stop, Mingyu hyung is nothing more than a friend, he never was and he never will be, drop the idea", He scolded himself as his walking stopped and he stood at the same spot for another minute, before consuming his walking.