Raison D'être

Pilot

No one wants me.

I'm currently in my room with a drink in my hand, contemplating whether I should try it. It's Will's Congratulatory Party at having finally been wanted by someone. He is lucky, he will live his life having someone who wants him at this age. It's difficult for teenagers to get chosen out of the home, or any orphanage for that matter. Who would want a teen? We're at an age where we are figuring things out in our lives, but a damaged teen? Isn't that what I am? Damaged because not even my mother wanted me.

Nonetheless, I am happy for Will. He is like a brother to me; I've known him since my mother left me. A newborn just left at the steps and a quick knock on the door before she scurried off, but hey she gave me a name before she left, Anastasia. That's good enough, right? Will's biological mother was nice enough to actually admit him to this place, and kiss him goodbye before leaving him.

I am still unsure as to how Will and I became friends, but I just remember us sticking by each other's side. He is like the brother I never had. We especially stuck with each other throughout our experiences in high school, aka hell. Don't get me wrong, I love learning. Yes, I actually said that. I got great grades, in fact throughout high school I made honor roll, but I had to spend every night, hours on end just to maintain the honor roll status. Apparently, you need experience or some other passion you have in life, along with being able to manage grades to have colleges dish out scholarships. I never really put myself out there in high school, so extracurriculars were not on the agenda. Do I regret it? Slightly, but again, I'm still figuring out what I want to do with my life. All I know is that as soon as I turn 18, I'm leaving this place. I will no longer be under their care, so I know I'll have to find a job somewhere. I'll probably save up for college and absorb more knowledge at whatever college will take me. My thoughts of college are interrupted when Will comes in the door.

"Hey," he hands me another drink before taking mine out of my hand and downing it. I don't drink by the way. Beer, though I have never tired, just isn't my forte. 

"Well hello, there mister" I reply with full sarcasm.

"Why aren't you out enjoying my party?"

"You know me Will, parties aren't my thing. You should go back out there and enjoy it. It is your last day here," my convincing doesn't do much because Will takes a seat next to me on my bed.

"You're right. It is my last day here," Will grabs my hand, and turns serious for a moment "I will stay here for you." I get up, frustrated at having to talk about this again, "Will you are not staying here. Not for me. Not for anyone. So please stop saying that. I love you Will, but you are given an opportunity here. Please take it."

"Anastasia, you're all I've known my whole life, how could I leave you? I understand that there is an opportunity here for me, but what good is it if I don't get to experience it with you? What good is anything without you? You've been there for me through everything. What does that say about me if I just leave you?"

"You're not leaving me Will, you're just moving forward. I will be right behind you anyway. I turn 18 next month and I'll be out of here and I can visit you whenever I want." At this point Will is quiet, he is contemplating on what to say next. Before he can say anything, I put my hands on his cheeks and he raises his eyes to mine, "Please Will, live your life. I want you to experience what it's like to have parents, do it for the both of us. When I see you next month, you'll tell me all about it." Will looks into my eyes before taking a deep sigh and looking back down. He looks like he wants to say more before finally settling on his words.

"I'll tell you all about it," Will looks back up into my eyes and takes the drink that he gave me when he walked in and downs it. "You better" I punch him playfully on the shoulder before he sends me his playful grin. "You sure you don't want to party, I put on some good bops," he begins to bang his head and throw up a rock n roll sign. I chuckle and tell him I have to study and with that, he returns a smile and walks out.