Raison D'être

See Me

Anastasia

People were spread out in small groups chattering away with wine in hand, beers in others, and some just around the fire pit making s'mores. I wanted to be part of the latter, but Carla had other plans for me, "alright come, I want you to meet Diego."

As she dragged me along, a tall man with curly brown hair, freckles, and light brown eyes approached Carla and me. A smile was radiant on his face as he gazed at Carla the entire time. He placed a kiss on Carla's cheek and said "hello amor," before turning to me, "this must be the friend that you go on about."

Carla laughs, "yes this is my sister from another mister. My other lover if you please-"

We all laugh as I continue, "yes, I am the one she goes on about."

"Well, it's a pleasure to meet you," he nods his head and shakes my hand firmly.

"I'll get you ladies something to drink,"

As he walks off Carla swivels her head, "isn't he a dream?"

I laugh while commending her, "yes Carla, you did well. Looks a lot like a tan and leaner version of Brenton Thwaites, so yes I would say you've acquired a fine taste in men."

"Yess, I was thinking he looked a lot like him, just Spanish."

"See!"

She laughs as Diego comes back, "hey so let me introduce you lovely ladies to my friends." We followed him until we approached three tall lean men. It seemed everyone was taller than me even with my heels on. The blonde hair, blue-eyed, was Derek. He was Greek. Up next Jason, tall blond athletic build, also Greek. Lastly was Ethan, who was a curly-haired Portuguese, lean in his frame. All of them said their hello's and asked where I was going to college

"Oh, I'm not going to college."

"Oh, so what do you plan on doing?"

"I-I" I was yet again at a loss of words. It seemed everyone was more interested in my future than I was.

"She works for Lorenzo Amoretto," Carla interrupts and I give her a small smile that translates as thank you.

"Oh wow! You must be really smart to work for him after high school. Wait, if you don't mind me asking how old are you?"

"21"

"Oh wow, so you're older than most of us here."

"Yeah, I guess."

"Well, you look amazing."

"Thank you."

Ethan chuckles, "enough flirting Derek, let her mingle."

"Oh shut up Ethan. I can mingle with her. You don't mind, do you?" as he turns over to me.

I smile, "no not really. I don't really know many people here."

"Don't go out much?"

"Is it that noticeable?"

He laughter bellows, "I have a feeling you're just hiding in your shell."

"Something like that." The friendliness that Derek brings is refreshing and to top it off he is good looking as well. It's starting to seem that coming here wasn't so bad.

Hours pass as I find myself still talking with Derek. He is interesting, to say the least. I learned more about Derek and his passions in art and lacrosse, his philosophy major, and so forth. Maybe I was crazy, but it was unlikely I was going to see him again. So rather than spilling my sob story, my truth that very few knew- two people actually, I gave myself a new identity. One that wouldn't generate pity. I still had my memories to endure, the constant reminder of why I don't deserve to live. So I fabricated the truth and gave what felt right to the conversation.