I will always love you

Sad memoreis

On Friday morning Katya tried to keep herself busy. So she swept the shop floor and rearranged the flowers on display twice. Surpassingly she was really excited to meet up with Trixie. They texted a little bit throughout the week. Katya decided to bring Trixie flowers. She wants to be nice that's it.

"Do you have a date tonight buttercup?" Latrice said smirking. She was leaning on the counter. Katya has been making a pretty bouquet for the last 30 minutes.

"No ... I just ... we are just old friends ... I think ... just wanted to be nice and bring a gift you know"

"Whatever you say" the older woman said shaking her head.

Trixie picked the bar. It was definitely expensive looking. Katya could hear the music and chatter when she walked in. Her hands were shaking just a little. She walked through the place looking for the big pile of blonde hair.

After a minute she found Trixie. She was sitting in one of those secluded areas in the back. Katya was glad that they could have a little bit of privacy.

"Kitty is that for me" Trixie said smiling wildly.

Katya didn't say anything just handed the flowers. Trixie look at them with excitement. She called a waitress and asked for some water.

"You shouldn't have to" she whispered hugging Katya. This was the first time that the two women had any physical contact.

Katya's body was on fire. She had to pull away.

"It's fine. I work at a gardening shop" the Russian said and sat down in the seat in front of Trixie.

"Really. That's exiting. Tell me more, actually tell me everything that I missed" Trixie said taking a sip from her wine glass. They started talking about some easy topics. Where Katya works, Trixie's favorite make up products, Katya's roommates and what they do, Trixie's photo shoots. The conversation was a little bit tense. It was understandable they haven't seen each other in years and neither of them knew where this "thing" is going to go.

After a while the girls started a second bottle of wine. The conversation became a little more personal.

"So Kitty you are single right? Did you date anyone?"

"Yeah I had a girlfriend but we split up" Katya said looking at her drink. For some reason she couldn't look into Trixie's eyes "nothing bad happened. We just couldn't get along. I think I have always seen her as my friend"

Trixie smiled with sadness in her eyes "I haven't dated anyone since you. Just quick sex with women and ... some men" she said taking a big sip of her wine.

"You with men really. I thought you are like ... exclusively into women" Katya was surprised.

"Turned out I like both" Trixie looked into Katya's eyes. She seemed scared. Trixie was usually the confident one "It took me a while to understand myself"

"Trix I don't care about it, you know it doesn't change anything" between us she wanted to say. Katya grabbed Trixie's hands in hers, maybe it was the wine but the younger girl could feel her face slowly turn red.

"Thank you kitten" Trixie's face was inches away from Katya's "After the break up. I tried to find you. I called and texted" Katya took a deep breath "Fuck I messaged you on Facebook. When I visited my family a few months after that, I went to your house but you were gone. Your parents" Katya tensed up. She didn't talk about her family, she just couldn't "told me to go fuck myself and that you are not their daughter anymore. I figured you don't live with them, you went to college. Did you Kitty? You always wanted to study art"

"I did. I studied in Boston community college. I dropped out" Katya said. She could feel her voice shaking. She didn't like to go back to that time in her life "it was rough"

Trixie stood up from her seat, made her way to Katya's side, she sat down and wrapped her arm around Katya. The younger immediately hugged her. Trixie started to play with Katya's hair. The Russian could feel her anxiety melt away. Trixie made her feel so safe. If the other girl wasn't here she would probably have a panic attack.

"I'm sorry. I tried but I couldn't find you. I'm sorry that I gave up"

"It's okay you tried. I blocked you on everything, it's kind of my fault. I just couldn't ... I missed you so much Trixie"

"I missed you too kitten" Trixie kissed her forehead "We can't go back to the past. It already happened. All I want is to have you in my life again. We should just hang out and see where it takes us. So friends?"

"Friends"