Over the River and Through the Woods (Adventures!AU Book 2)

Ch. 43 Aftermath

RETURN OF THE GENDERFLUID MONARCH
Yes I'm back! A day before the finale! How appropriate lol
And, as tradition demands, I'm back with pain. Cross really ain't gettin any rest from canon or this fanon. It's character development at least!

Now, this chapter is a bit heavier on some topics, so please take care of yourself here!

Warnings: Descriptive panic attack, self blame, self hatred, hints to past self harm (it's mainly just implied).

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Not for me. Not for me!

Pure horror gripped Crosshair with unrelenting force as Shadow's words echoed over and over in his head.

"Alphians have thirteen lives. And I just lost one."

He didn't take her seriously when she warned him of the nightmare.

He brushed her off.

Told her she made a big deal out of nothing...

And now she was down a life, sacrificing it for him.

She died for him.

Shadow died for him.

Because of him.

The realization stole his breath.

He did this.

It was all his fault.

He didn't believe her.

Didn't trust her.

It was all his fault.

It was all his fault!

Staggering back from the group, ignoring their calls for him to stop, Crosshair abandoned his helmet and fled into the tunnels.

Head spinning, mind screaming, breath coming in short gasps, Crosshair didn't know where he was going.

Didn't know which way to turn.

Didn't know how deep the tunnels led.

Didn't know how far he'd go.

All he knew was he had to run.

Run away from his mistake.

Run away from the fact that, thanks to him, the woman he cared for died.

Had he listened...

Had he taken her seriously...

Had he trusted her...

It's all your fault!

You killed her!

You killed her!

No!

He didn't know! He would never hurt her! He didn't know!

How did you treat her? You scorned her! Turned her away, drove her off! She only ever wanted to help and now she's lost a life thanks to you!

"No!" The scream ripped from his raw throat, echoing shrilly through the rocky passageways.

"Crosshair!"

Shadow's yell reached him, sending bolts of terror through him.

She would tear into him.

Rip him apart.

Rightfully remind him that her death was his fault and his fault alone.

Breaking into a run once more, blood dripping down his arm and sweat running down his face, Crosshair frantically tried to outrun the team chasing him down.