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Title: The blurb hinting at the plot twist made the title relevant enough. Halfway through the book, the title made a lot more sense. Well done.
Cover: It was neat, and the colors were a nice aesthetic, in my opinion. The title was legible, and the cover was genre-fitting.
If Kai is the man on the cover, shouldn't he have blonde hair? Or does he have a darker shade than I imagined?
Usually, Wattpad covers show the author's username and not their actual name, but that's just the norm, and everyone is free to do as they like!
Blurb: I loved the blurb. It brought out the genre while still inclining that the novel is not only its genre. I honestly would not have voluntarily read if it had been all about the sex.
One small thing I noticed:
When Kai walks in on her at an ungodly time, he is determined to break down her walls and admit to her fantasies to him.
The latter part of this sentence could read more smoothly? 'admit to her fantasies to him' doesn't sound great. Try words like confess, profess or acknowledge. Restructuring the sentence might help too.
Grammar: Quite good. I commented on the few errors I saw. Didn't intercept readability whatsoever.
Characters: Despite no separate section for her, Massie is my favorite character, I think.
Melanie: protagonist
➡ Is she annoying? No. (But keep in mind that readers are always quick to judge any female character and quickly tack a label to her actions.)
➡ What I found unsatisfying was her explicit hate (negative opinions) towards the wealthy not being brought up quite enough. It's blatantly stated in the first chapter. And when things get heated between her and Kai, she fears the outcome because of his family's power over her. Good.
But, she never held Kai's status against him. They had a rocky start for entirely different reasons, and that's fine; I just thought that this misbelief in her head shouldn't play favorites with Kai.
➡ Loved it when she cried over the interrogation in c1 08.
➡ I like how she's slowly spiraling as every problem piles one on top of the other. Very realistic.
Kai : romantic interest
➡ Does Kai pressure her too much? Since I can see Melanie's thoughts, the answer is 'most definitely not.'
➡ Does Kai sound pervy? The library full of erotica books makes it a little so.
➡ liked that more and more flaws were explored as the story went on. I'd rather see toxic traits than a perfect painting.
