Martin Garrix & Dean Lewis - Used To Love
I turned my car up the driveway of my parents' farm. It's been 10 years since I last visited the place where I grew up. The farm hasn't changed a bit, just like the neighborhood. The big old oak tree was still standing in the yard, with the old treehouse in it, and a swinging rope hanging from one of its branches. I get out of my car and look over to the neighbors' house, it hasn't changed much either.
"Darling!" my mother rushed towards me and ingulfed me in a big hug. "Hi mom" I greeted her as I hugged her back. "Did you have a good flight?" She asked, opening my trunk to get my suitcases out. "It was a long trip but it went well" I answered her. My mom handed me one of my suitcases and we walked inside the house.
"Coffee?" my mom asked me. "Yes please" I answer her as I put my suitcase down and walked towards the living room, looking for my dad. "Where's dad?" I ask my mom confused. "He's with the horses!" my mom yelled from the kitchen. I sit down on the couch as my mom entered the living room with two mugs of coffee. She hands me my coffee and thank her. My mom and I kept on talking for what seemed ages.
"I'm going to bring my suitcases up to my room." I told my mom as I took my suitcases and walked up the stairs. I opened the door to my old room and looked around. My room was identical to how I left it 10 years ago. I put my suitcases in the corner, walked towards the bed and sat down on it. The wall was covered in pictures of me with friends and family.
My eye fell on one of the biggest photos, my favorite picture with Daniel. It was taken at one of Daniel's kart races. The photo showed Daniel giving me a kiss on the cheek which put a big smile on my face. I stood up and walked towards the wall, taking the picture from the wall to take a closer look. As I held the picture in my hands, I turned towards the window. Daniel's house was across the road so we could see each other through our bedroom windows.
The feeling of sadness suddenly hit me. I haven't spoken to Daniel in years. Just before his debut with Red Bull, I sent him a message to congratulate him. I still thought about him a lot. I've watched every race and cheered for him. I understood he was very busy so that's why I didn't contact him, even though it broke me. He was always there to heal my scars.
"Darling, dinner's ready!" my mother called from the bottom of the stairs. I went downstairs and went straight to my dad to give him a tight hug. "Missed you dad" I whispered. "I missed you too sweets" a smile appeared on my father's face as we let each other go. It did not remain silent for long during dinner. We all had a lot to tell, even though we call each other every week. After dinner I decided to take a walk around the neighborhood.
The sun started to set, which made a beautiful view. There's a stream that runs behind the farm. I walk up to it and sit on the grass. Daniel and I used to lay here all night, talking about all sorts of things. I look across the stream to the corn field. My thoughts go back to the one time Daniel returned from karting in Europe.
He had been gone for six months and during that time we had no contact. The first night he returned, we met by the stream. He told about his adventure and I told him about the things I had experienced at home. At one point in the conversation, he turned his head my way. He looked into my eyes and, all of the sudden, he gently pressed his lips against mine.
Approaching footsteps took me out of the flashback. I turn around and was met by Daniel. I looked at him in surprise and didn't know what to say. "I didn't know you were home" Daniel said with a big smile on his face. I blink a few times to make sure that I'm not dreaming. "Could say the same" I chuckle. Daniel sits down next to me and sighs. "This has been a long time" he says and I nod. I still didn't know what to say.
"What brings you here, at the stream?" He asked. I look down at my hands. "Remembering the only thing that made me feel like I was worth it." I shrug. I looked at Daniel and saw that he felt a bit embarrassed. "You know," he started but thought for a moment, before he continued "If I could, I would have made things right." I look at him in surprise. Something snapped inside me. "It was your own choice Daniel, you made the choice to travel the world, to do the most dangerous job one could ever imagine."
Daniel was silent after what I said. It may have been tough to hear, but so was his choice at the time. "I can't escape, you're still in my head. I'm constantly running from the emptiness, but nothing seems to work" I sigh as I was about to get up, but I was stopped. "Sit with me" said Daniel with a small smile. Daniel laid down and patted the space next to him, asking me to do the same. I laid down next to him. For a moment I had forgotten what had just been said. It felt just like it used to be.
"We can go back to the way that we used to love." Daniel said as he took my hand in his. "We can't" I say confused and looked at him. Daniel turned his head to me, and we looked at each other for a moment. Daniel turns on his side and is just inches away from my face. "Give me a moment, I need just a little more time" he says as he carefully pressed his lips on mine.
