Ma Fille Chérie | Billie Eilish

quatorze

a/n:

can u humans drop some ideas of what you wanna read for when billie settles into her headspace

i wanna get u involved the best i can <33

emetophobia warning for this chapter!!!

billie eilish, november 2nd 

los angeles | CA

i was really enjoying the movie but i was finding it hard to focus after about half an hour. lilou and i were sharing the popcorn but it was starting to make my stomach hurt, so i had stopped eating it.

the longer time went on the stronger the cramps were becoming. i thought popcorn was gluten free, and i had eaten it before with no issues so i didn't really know why it was hurting this bad.

i kept it to myself. i didn't want to ruin our day out, we're supposed to be having fun, but it was becoming increasingly obvious to others i was uncomfortable.

i kept shifting around in my seat and sipping on my water trying to ease the pain.

"billie? are you okay? do you have to go to the bathroom?"

i snapped my head toward lilou, her whisper in my ear scaring me. "oh uh no, im fine" i whispered back. lilou was not convinced.

"billie..."

"im fine, i swear"

she let it go and just grabbed a hold of my hand, focusing her gaze back on the movie. lilou rubbed her thumb back and forth against my skin, making me feel a little better but when sweat beads started to form on my forehead i knew i had to get out of there.

i pulled my hand away from lilou's and got up from my seat. she looked up at me curiously. i shuffled out of the aisle and walked briskly out of the theatre. i walked quickly down the funky colored carpeted halls towards the bathrooms.

i pushed open the door closest to me and walked over to the sink. i stuck my hands to the side of the ceramic and looked at myself in the mirror.

my cheeks were flushed pink but the skin surrounding was starting to turn a pale green. this is not good.

the door swung open to lilou. of course she had to follow me the one time i didn't want her to see me. "n-no, leave, p-please go" my voice wavered trying to warn her. i stood back and pointed to the door with one hand, the other quickly going to cover my mouth that was rapidly filling with saliva.

"no, no i'm not going, billie come over here" lilou said coming over and guiding me over to a toilet bowl. i wrapped an arm around my stomach and hunched over, putting the one that was previously on my mouth onto the cold plastic seat. 

i didnt even have time to gag before all the food in my digestive system came screaming up my throat. lilou grabbed my hair and quickly pulled it out of the way, forming it into a ponytail at the back of my head. 

tears brimmed my eyes. i hated feeling like this, well im sure anyone would. i'm not normally a thrower-upper. it normally comes out the other end. which, kinda glad it didn't today even though i hate this. 

with one finally heave my knees buckled and i dropped to the floor. i leant against lilou's legs starting to cry. she crouched down beside me and brushed some strands of sweaty hair out of my face. 

"its okay baby, you're okay," she said reaching over to the toilet roll and tearing some off. she wiped my mouth and discarded it into the toilet. "hey, look at me" she said gently. i looked at her through my blurry eyes. "do you know what made you sick?" she asked. "uhm, i have an allergy to gluten" i hiccuped rubbing my wet eyes. 

"you're allergic to gluten!? billie why didn't you tell me!" 

"im sorry, i thought i could handle i-it," before i knew it i was sobbing. lilou sat down beside me and brought me into her lap. "oh ma fille chérie, you're okay" lilou rubbed my back. i wrapped my arms around her neck and laid my head on her chest. 

i stopped crying after a few minutes but just stayed in the same position. i didnt wanna leave. "how are you feeling now?" lilou asked quietly. "tummy hurts" i mumbled into her shirt. 

"your tummy hurts still?" 

i nodded. "wheres your phone angel?" lilou asked. i reached down and pulled it out of my pocket and handed it to her.

 "can you do the password for me?"

i pulled my finger up to my phone and tapped out the four numbers unlocking the device. lilou turned it back to face her and was looking at it. 

once she was done using it she slipped it into her own pocket and started moving me. i whined and clung onto her. "c'mon baby stand up" lilou said. i shook my head. 

"i know your hurting, darling, but i wanna get you out of the gross bathroom" 

i let her stand me up. i felt light headed and dizzy. lilou flushed my vomit down the toilet and walked me out of the bathrooms into the hallway again. she walked us past the theater where finneas and claudia were. 

i looked at her confused. 

"i messaged finneas what happened we're gonna go home, okay? finneas and claudia are going to stay out for the movie and come home later"