Forever Kind of Love

Chapter 29

Kai picks me up around seven, and asks if I'm in a staying-in or going-out mood. He's always so considerate of me, and it's nice.

"Hmm, I think today is a stay-in kind of day if that's okay with you."

"Of course baby. I can make dinner at my place and then we can watch a movie or a couple episodes of Lucifer."
Wow, this man really gets me. I'm a little surprised that we are going to hang out at his apartment because we usually hang out at mine. I asked Kai about it once, and he said that he just liked being in a space that felt like me. I fell a little more in love with him. He makes me do that a lot, actually.

I really try not to compare my feelings for Kai to any of my old boyfriends, but it's hard not to think that he's so much better, or that I feel so much happier and in love now. Then the distressing thought of, "That's what I thought about all the other guys too" hits me. I'm usually good about shaking the thought off, but lately it's been getting harder to do. It's like the more serious we get, the more I believe that we won't last.

All throughout dinner and a movie, I'm thinking about my forever. Does Kai want to be in it? Do I even know what I want in it? Ugh. It's really frustrating. Kai's dinner was wonderful and he had fun stories from work, but I just couldn't stay in the moment. The more I think, the more confused I become.

It's like Kai can sense my uneasy tangle of thoughts because he pauses the movie and pulls me onto his lap. We just sit together for a few minutes before I sigh. "I'm sorry I've been a little out of it." He presses a soft kiss onto my neck. "Don't be. You know if anything's wrong, you can tell me." I twist my head to smile back at him. When he's holding me like this, nothing is wrong. That alone feels like an answer to my questions about forever.

"I know," and then I kiss him.