Nobody Knows | Jeon Jungkook

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I know I've said many times that I've found myself in situations where I felt helpless and useless, but I take that back. Now, at this very moment, I have reached the ultimate level of helplessness that it already feels like I have hit the ground head first.

The screams that fill my ears are shrill and loud, so loud that I can almost feel my organs rupturing. And the sight of this in combination is what makes me want to be blind and deaf at the same time.

You would probably declare someone who wants to be disabled in any way to be completely crazy, but can anyone judge me for seeing and hearing a part of me in so much pain that that is exactly what I want right now?

I know that the unintelligible words hitting my eardrums and the images hitting against my optic nerves are being relayed to my brain, but why does it feel like both senses are connected to my heart and traveling through my chest to give me a suffocating feeling there?

I rush to her faster than I ever have even before she can fall to the ground. Everything has happened in the last probably five seconds, but still, it's like time has stopped and we're all moving in slow motion. My arms reach forward and I catch her by her shoulders, her knees going weak because of the horror in front of her eyes.

I stood further away, unable to see what the reason for her collapse was, but I knew right from the look on her face that it couldn't have been anything good. But now that I have a quick look at the contents of the box before I kneel on the floor with her holding me, I have to push the urge to vomit into a corner.

The severed arm lies in the box I'm staring at as Irina's screams muffle against my chest. It's Nikolai's arm, that's for sure, and that sends a shiver down my spine because the worst I imagined was better than what's happening in reality right now.

The anguish and panic I felt a few minutes ago when I was afraid for Irina's safety and that's why I came here so fast comes up again and makes my hands go numb. I break out in a cold sweat that slowly runs down my back and temples, but I care little for it because Irina's condition is worse than that.

"Dad!" she continues to scream and cry, the sound waves pounding against my ear like a sledgehammer, and I squeeze my eyes tightly shut.

Irina grabs her head and her vulnerable body slouches forward as her tears form a puddle on the parquet floor. To say that everything that is happening right now shocks me would be an understatement, but I don't have much time to understand the situation or put meaning into it because my only focus is the person who is currently tearing my heart into a thousand pieces.

Another soft gasp and cry catch my attention, despite Irina's heartbreaking sobs, and I slowly look up. I see on the other side of the table Taehyung hugging Sora to his chest as she cries against him, her body shaking vigorously as she does so. Taehyung's and my eyes meet, his lips pressed into a straight line as he strokes his hand soothingly over her back.

There is so much hidden behind his eyes and I have to admit that I have never seen him like this before. He seems shocked just like me, much more helpless, and maybe a little angry. He has always been a person who showed his negative emotions more than me and even now I can see the fire burning in his eyes.

"Take her out of here," I say in a soft voice, more like a request than a demand.

He nods, not refusing because I know he too can't stand to see either Sora or Irina in such a condition. We both have to protect them at all costs and I don't want my sister to be traumatized for the rest of her life because of such a sight, although I think it's too late for that. She'll never forget it.