To the One I Loved

Chapter Nineteen: She's Awake

After the whole thing with Nina last night, Joan sent me home to "get sleep" as if I'd actually go to sleep after everything that happened.

Thank God that today is Saturday, because school is one thing I do not feel like doing. I couldn't go to sleep last night. All I could think about was Nina and the letters.

I couldn't even read the letters last night. Me reading the letters woke her up, and I felt obligated to read them in front of her. I don't know why, but that's what my mind's already made up.

I grab a towel and head to the bathroom. Visiting hours are at ten for Nina because she's going to be doing chemo early this morning. Right now its 8:30. I head into the bathroom and run the shower water. Then I get in.

At first I just stand for minutes. Letting the hotter than warm water run over me and down onto my skin. It felt smooth and relaxing. It felt like I could finally breath again. And with that, I let out a huge sigh.

After a like five minutes, I finally decided to wash my body. So that's what I did. Then I rinsed all of the soap off of me. I reached over to turn the water off and pulled the shower curtain back, pulling my towel off the rack and wrapping it around my waist.

Then I headed back into my room. I stopped when I got inside and closed my door behind me. I looked over to the window where it all started. I could've ignored her. Pretend I didn't know she was there. I could've gone on and never got to know the best thing that would happen to me in life. And I'm forever grateful that I didn't.

Then I grab a black tshirt from my top drawer and some gray sweats from my bottom draw. I put on white socks and my black slides. Then I grab my plain, black hooded jacket. I slip my keys and phone into my jacket pocket. Then I grab my tootbrush and head back into the bathroom. I brush my teeth, and then I'm ready to see Nina. But its only 9:15.

I leave the house anyway. The hospital is only a ten minute drive from my house. So I decide to go to the mall to get her a present. I stop at the store that describes Nina with one word: books. Yup. The book store.

I remember Nina saying that there was this new book by one of her favorite authors. Gayle Forman. I headed over to the teen section. Then I grab a copy of I Was Here by Gayle Forman.

I head to the checkout. I pull my wallet from my back pocket and put a 20 on the counter. The guy at the register takes the money and then gives me change along with a receipt.

I take it and the book which the man had put into a bag. Then I head out, looking at my phone for the time. It was 9:45. By the time I got there I would be able to see her.

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I pull up in the hospital parking lot. I take my,keys out of the ignition and head into the hospital. She got transferred from the emergency room to just a regular hospital room for cancer patients.

I head up to the third floor where Nina is. Crap. I left her gift in the car. But I didn't forget to grab the notebook. It was resting against my palm and in between my fingers.

I finally reach the front of Nina's door. I didn't even check in. I guess it wasn't that important, either, because no one stopped me.

I knocked on the door. "Come in," it was a faint still voice. I opened the door to see Nina and Beth. Nina looked well. She was sitting up in her hospital bed and had a smile on her face. Beth was sitting in a chair next to the bed.

"Hey," I said.

"Hey," she responded. She smiled. Then she patted a spot next to her on the bed. "Come, sit." She said. I did like she said. I went to the opposite side of the bed than Beth. The side closest to the wall.

"She's awake," Beth said, "Fully awake."

"I heard you," Nina said to me, taking my hand. "You kept me alive." She smiled.

"I was so worried," I said. She nodded, still smiling. She even laughed a little.

"I know," she said. "That's why I left you the letters. They were supposed to help. Give you closure once I died."

"If you died, I'd never receive closure," I said, "I don't think any of us would."

"I know it seems like that, Alex, but I was only doing what I though was best for you." She responded.

I nodded in consent with what she said. "I know," I said. "I know."

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A/n: hey guys. Sorry this chapter is kind of short. The next one will be longer, though.

But don't forget to give me feedback.! Okay.? Okay.! Bye, now.