Forbidden

Alex

I  stared at Lady as she went through our room which had glass bathroom and had the ocean view even lying on the bed.

"This is so beautiful... I wanna live here forever" she giggled.

What was I doing here instead of being with the center of my world.

Breaking up with Lady meant coming out and also being disowned by my Family.

I couldn't lose Smart and can't lose my Family.

"Baby....let's test the bed" Lady Whispered in my ears hugging me closely.

"Stop..I'm tired,I might as well take a rest from working" I  moved away from her going to sit on the bed.

"Seriously?" She asked.

"Please" I answered.
"Well,I want us to fix our wedding date" She said.

"You know that's not happening until I'm established,we are just 24,I don't want to be tied down forever" I replied.

"You got tied down the month we decided to have Blossom and you proposed to me..I have a beauty salon and you are the sales representative of your father..what more do we need"she demanded.

" I am not ready..emotionally or mentally fit and that's it"I stood going to the door.

" We are having a conversation right now,where are you going to?"She stood akimbo.

" Out,to clear my head and  Marriage is out of the question but if you find someone else ready to take that step..Feel free"I opened the door and left.

What am I doing?The only person I have ever dreamed of marrying was three hours away from me with my kid.

I missed his smiles and the way his hands aimlessly rubbed his stomach or when he shook his legs whenever he was nervous.

Smart.
I loved him more than life itself.
The Eight years with him have been the best moments of my life.

I can always remember how he usually walked down the school corridor with his friends,you would call him the arrogant straight Jock until you got close to him and then you'll find out he was the best human being who would put even the devil's happiness over his.

Yeah,He was kind and gentle.Gave best advice and would listen to you rant about nothing for days.

He would be thinking right now of what I was doing with Lady.

"Hey,Alex.. I'm sorry,I shouldn't have brought marriage up,you are right..we can always wait till next year"Lady appeared from nowhere linking our hands together.

" I don't want to get married"I said.

" Me too,we can just be like this forever..we can have two more kids"she smiled.

" I don't want more kids"I shook my head.

" Me too,Let's just live on with our lives"She laughed.

How I wish I could just tell her what I was feeling.

I felt bad for leading her on.I was an idiot keeping two people on hold with their lives.

" Lady...",I began.

"Wow..that's a ship,lets go ,I want some pictures"Lady shouted and ran towards the ship.