Forbidden

Smart

I stared at our house tapping my feet angrily.
"I thought you finally stopped coming" My little sister Kim walked up to me.

"What are you doing outside? Mom will kill you" I said.

"She said it's gonna rain soon, you should come in for dinner" Kim rolled her eyes.
"Who?" I asked.

"Mom" she tugged my hand.
I slowly walked into the house I haven't been in for seven years.

It was refurnished, New sofa, curtain and Our pictures was displayed on the walls including mine.

"Daddy wouldn't let mom take it down no matter what.. I thought you would still look like this" Kim pointed at my college graduation picture.
"What are you doing in here?" Kiki, my immediate elder sister asked.

"She invited me in" I answered.

"Sit down, stop acting like a stranger" mom said.
"We are home" Dad said coming in with Dear and her two years old kid.

She was divorced and moved back. She lived next door but always ate here.

"Let's eat" mom said.

We all sat down.
"The grace" Mom spoke up and we bent our head in prayer.

"I knew you guys would eat without me even though I was told to leave everything and come home" my elder brother King said and then he saw me.

"  I'm surprised too" Kiki smiled.

Tears filled my eyes when I savoured the taste of pad Thai.
My mom was a Thai woman who  married an American but made sure we ate Thai food.
She made the best Pad Thai.

"Why are you crying?" Kim asked.

"Don't ask him"mom replied.

"Eat... I know you've missed it" Dad smiled.
I dug in eating rapidly and hurriedly. I haven't eaten this much for so long and no matter how much I ate Thai food in restaurants, it didn't quite hit right like mom's own.

I came here earlier to run away from Alex. I heard the news he walked away from his wedding, I didn't want to interrupt Addy's date with her husband so I came here.

The plan was to stand here until it was late then I would find a hotel to sleep in.

I ate all the Thai curry she put on my plate.

"Should we order pizza, I'm hungry"Kiki said.

"Why?" I asked.

"You and King ate all the food, I know you missed mom's cooking but I didn't realize both of you were this hungry"Dear said.

" I'm sorry..I'll pay for the pizza"I apologized.

" Why will you apologize?stop acting like a stranger already"Dad smiled.

" I'm not going to apologize for the past seven years or what I told you a month ago but it has haunted me,kept me awake for nights..the guilt..You're right,you don't deserve everything I put you through...Smart,I am willing to be your mother again"Mom said.

I looked at her.

" What about me, I'm not ready to accept you back with open arms because you can't give back the seven years I missed..goodnight"I walked away.

" Hey...hey ..mom packed food for you"Dad followed me out.
" Dad"I hugged him.

" Those weeks you couldn't come she was worried sick,No matter what she always looked out for you,she made sure you weren't sick and made sure I paid your rent in time,gave you money every week..she was stubborn but she loved you" Dad said.

"I don't think I can just forget everything she did..night dad" I entered my car and drove off.

My mom.
My mom.
No apology could heal the wound in my heart.
I still had the scar I sustained in one of her beatings on my back.
She wanted me back to the family.

My mom wanted me.
My mom.