Locker 246

PROLOGUE

PROLOGUE

"....I love how he makes me feel like I can do anything, like everything's possible....."

"....He brings out the best in me..."

​"....He is the best, and he's the wind beneath the wings I never knew I had...."

"....I learned to believe in myself because of him, because he believed in me..."

"....He's my miracle,

my angel,

my light,

my love,

my stalker...."

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May mga pagkakataong nahuhulog ang loob natin para sa isang tao ngunit hindi sapat ang ating lakas ng loob upang ipagtapat ito sa kanila. Dahil sa takot na baka hindi nila tayo magustuhan kung kaya ang pagtanging ito ay nananatiling isang lihim na lamang. Ang tanging bagay na lang tuloy na nagagawa natin ay ang mahalin at sundan sila nang patago...nang palihim. 'Yung tipong nabubusog na sa tuwa ang puso mo tuwing makikita mo sya. Tila ba ang bawat segundong nasisilayan mo siya ay lubhang napakahalaga. Pero para sa kanya, isa ka lamang nilalang na nabubuhay sa mundong ito ngunit hindi sa kanyang mundo.

Some people call it "admiring," some call it "following," and others label it as "stalking."

But as for me, I call it loving.

I have known him since grade school. I was in fifth grade, and he was just a year ahead of me when I first saw him. It is impossible for me to forget the first time I laid eyes on him. I am now in my second year in college and for those years that passed, I have loved him---only him---secretly. The only thing that changed is that my initial feeling of admiration has grown stronger and deeper with every passing sunrise.

I do not know if he is even aware of my very existence, but for me, seeing his face is too enough because I know and already accepted the fact that he will never see me the way I look at him. He doesn't even look at me in the first place. He is the kind of guy who doesn't give a damn about the people around him. He walks along the corridors as if he doesn't hear the girls—and the people with the same gender preference as I have—fangirling over him.

Pero nitong umaga lang, sa may hallway katapat ng Registrar's Office, parang tumigil sa pag-ikot ang mundo ko nang magkasalubong kami.

I examined his look like I usually do; he still wasn't wearing his uniform properly. Parati kasing hindi nakabutones ang unang dalawang butones ng polo niya, dahilan para makita ang t-shirt na suot niya. His hands were in his pockets as he strode with those long legs of his. Needless to say, his sneakers were, as always, whiter than my sister's teeth.

​I looked at his gorgeous face as he lightly chewed a gum. Baliw na kung baliw, pero I actually wished na sana ako na lang 'yung bubble gum na 'yun.

My heart literally skipped a beat when his lips formed a smile while looking at me. Everything happened so quickly and unexpectedly that my whole body froze in an instant. Suddenly, all I could hear was the deafening pounding inside my chest.

​I thought he was going to stop, but he just passed right by me. I turned around to see him talking to his best friend. I just thanked God I didn't smile back, because that would have been incredibly embarrassing.

​Akala ko, for the first time, tiningnan niya na ako. Pero nagkamali ako; nilagpasan niya lang ako, samantalang ako ay nadapa na dahil sa kanya naka-focus ang mga mata ko himbis na sa dinadaanan ko.

"Stupid."

"Lampang bakla."

"Tsk, fag."

Those were what I heard from the people who witnessed that stupidity of mine.

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