ERBoH Lyrics

Frank Sinatra vs Freddie Mercury

Announcer: Epic Rap Battles of History! Frank Sinatra vs Freddie Mercury! Begin!

Sinatra: Ho! What's wrong with your face? Baby, yikes! With those teeth when you're through there'll be no dust left to bite. Christ, newsflash, kid! This is show business! Show some class when you dress, shave that bush off your lips! Boom! Your band's named Queen, huh? Ain't that sweet. You dance like you rode a bicycle race with no seat. That's what's wrong with you people, you'll do anything to get famous. You changed your name to Mercury, You should've been Freddy Uranus.

Mercury: You think I haven't heard those things before. You're just a bully whose too scared to go to war. You had a hit song called, "My Way," but someone else wrote it. You're the least talented rat in your whole pack of rodents. You've got four notes in your whole range, you can't act and you can't dance. I'm more powerful than you and I'm wearing women's pants. Why do you stand there in a suit? It's like you're trying to bore me. When I rock the UK, South America gets horny. Because my songs have balls! They're the anthems of victory! Your music is like the sound track to a vasectomy. You're in the pocket of the mafia, and everybody knows, Guinea Dago!

Sinatra: Guinea Dago!

Mercury: Guinea Dago, Figaro!

Sinatra: Easy, Jaws of Life, I can't stand a racist. I love the coloreds and the queers, just ask Sammy Davis. Look, we all wanna swing, but you took it too far. You played butthole roulette and you lost the draw. 

Mercury: I took one for both teams from a disease no one knew existed. I didn't leave a mark on history, I French kissed it. I'm a champion of the world, extinguished in his prime! So kiss my ass, Frankie. But you'll have to wait in line. 

Announcer: Who won!? Who's next!? You decide! Epic Rap Battles of History!