Announcer: Epic Rap Battles of History! Elvis Presley vs Michael Jackson! Begin!
MJ: Ooh, Elvis Presley as I live and breathe! You stole rock and roll, gave us rockabilly cheese. You dance like an epileptic, nothing but left feet. I've seen it, every record you set, man, I beat it. Here's a tip: Don't swallow a bucket of drugs, so you won't die on the toilet dropping hunks of Burning Love. I'm Bad, I'm a Smooth Criminal, better face up. Call be Ed Sullivan, shoot you from the waist up. Watch me moonwalk and I step on your blue suade. Even in death I go platinum on Blu-Ray. Spitting out hits since I was 6 years old. I'm the King of Pop. You're the King of Jelly-Rolls.
Presley: Well, I died on the shitter, but I don't give a crap. You ain't got half the badass battle raps that I have. I got one for your monkey, two for your clothes, three for your family, and four for your nose. You better surrender, talking about them abc's. Cause all you wanna do is teach kids the birds and the bees. This is the big time Jacko, no dress rehersal. I'll light you up like your hair in a Pepsi commercial. I can tell you're angry, but I can't comprehend it. I stole from Black culture, why're you offended? Your Daddy beat gold records outta you like Alchemy, don't make me spank you and dangle your ass over a balcony.
MJ: Oooh, It's about time for a Thriller. Didn't lose any chocolate, I just added vanilla. I'm going Off the Wall, I won't stop till I get enough. Whopping your big fat ass with my shiny glove. How you gonna talk about the bird and the bees when you meet your own wife when she was only 14. Then you made one daughter, she came to me. I took her to my Neverland ranch to Hee Hee. You shoulda stayed in the Army, dude. Shamone! Even Tito looks better than you. I'm singing Aahhh, You're singing Don't Be Cruel. There's only one crown, baby. Let the one king rule.
Presley: You're a creeper, dude. You like to grab your own wanger. I only let you marry my daughter, cause I knew you'd never bang her. You think you're tough? Man, you look like Tootie. I was badder than you in my Blue Hawaiian movie. You lost your damn mind, that's why they cast you in the Wiz. You're like a sad, white woman who never got to be a kid. I'm out before you try to hold me and free your willy. Later, weirdo. Elvis is leaving the building.
Announcer: Who won!? Who's next!? You decide! Epic Rap Battles of History!
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ERBoH Lyrics
أدب تاريخيCredit: Lloyd Ahlquist aka EPICLloyd, Peter Shukoff aka NicePeter, Zach Sherwin, Atul Singh, Matthew Schlissel, Shaun Lewin, Brittany White, Ashlyn McIntyre, Morgan Christensen, Sulai Lopez, Jon Na, Jose "Choco" Reynoso, Josh Best, Ryan Moulton, Jav...
