Fade in to a distant shot of the Blues, yet their voices are just as loud as they normally are
Church: Well, good luck guys. Don't forget to change your underwear at least once a day. Tucker, that goes double for you.
Tucker: What? I'm the cleanest guy here.
Church: No, it goes double for you because now you're in charge of changing Caboose's as well.
Tucker: I hate you.
Crunchbite: Blorgh!
Andy: He doesn't wear any pants.
Tucker: Yeah, we noticed. If we meet anybody on this adventure, that might have to change.
Andy: Why, we're used to being naked. Free-ballin', come on! Commando.
Tucker: Let me just put it this way; I felt less threatened when Tex was staring at just the sword.
Tex: Huh what- oh, fyeuh uhm, yeah, uh- I was just admiring his... his alien... muscle structure.
Tucker: Yeah one particular part of his muscle structure.
Tex: Well that's just a matter of penis- I mean opinion.
Church: Smooth.
Wolfsen: And this is why I'm not romantically attracted to anyone. Y'all always thinking with your genitalia.
Church: Hold on, didn't you say you're lesbian?
Wolfsen: My bad, I'm not attracted to anyone HERE. Anyways-
Caboose: (cutting off Wolfsen) You told me it was another arm...
Crunchbite: Bluuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuurgh!
Andy: Hey Caboose- high five!
Caboose: (quietly) I don't want to do that any more...
Church: Tucker come here, I want to talk to you for a second. Listen, just drop off this weapon, and get back to Blue Base as fast as you can.
Tucker: What if I have to kill stuff, dude? I'm a lover, not a fighter.
Church: Hey now, Tucker, I'm the same way. That's why we get along so well. We're both just a couple of lovers.
Tucker: ...that sounded kinda gay dude.
Church: Yeah it did. Uhm... I feel obligated to say something encouraging as your boss.
Tucker: Our Captain died. You're just the guy pretending to be my boss.
Church: Well, you know in our given situation technically you could be seen as one of my employees.
Tucker: Except that I'm not.
Church: Echch, whatever! Listen, I just, as, as someone in an employee/manager relationship-
YOU ARE READING
MIA: Blood Gulch Chronicles
FanfictionÚlfa Hjörmundardóttir, a runaway Freelancer disguised as a Simulation Trooper. What would happen if she were to be sent onto a D82-EST Darter that just so happened to be heading towards Blood Gulch? Find out in MIA! Disclaimer: I do not own Red vs...
