Endlessly trying... (gonkillu)

Chapter 6

(extra long chapter to make up for the crappy last one...)(also TW)

(Killuas pov)

A good two weeks have passed, and Gon and I haven't talked to each other. Well more of I tried to ignore him, but the weird thing was I was going to try to sort things out, but I would always chicken out. I mean sure I liked him but how did he feel about all of this? I kind of blamed him but it wasn't his fault.

I felt that it was fair Gon did not like me back, first of all we just meet a good 3 weeks ago, second of all I'm 2 years younger than him, and third of all I'm not the best looking guy out there in the house, I'm sure he likes one of them and I came and ruined his chances! Man if that stupid game didn't happen maybe we would still be friends!

Now I feel bad, maybe I should apologize, it was wrong of me to get mad and now I just feel like a dick, plus maybe if I do apologize, we can be friends at least. I thought about what I would say. Well, I got dressed, Kurapika was in our room still sleeping, leorio was there too, 'there such a cute couple.' I thought.

I put on a lavender color turtleneck, black ripped jeans, I brushed out my hair and made sure it was back to its dry fluffy state. Then I put on some accessories and socks then I left to go to Gon's room.

I looked at the door, I got nervous, I sighed and was about to walk away and give up but I knew I just had to get it done and over with.

I walk back up and knock on the door. I could hear what sounded like I could only describe as a small buzzing sound. "Come in!" He spoke. I opened the door.

"Oh hey," he said "hey, I'm sorry to disturb you but I just wanted to talk to you and maybe straight some things out- what are you doing?" I said pointing at the canvas. "We'll this is technically fake skin, the collage supplies it and I can practice doing tattoos on it." He showed me the design.

"Woah! That's so cool!" I said probably with stars and sparkles around me like I'm some kind of anime, "sorry I just- anyway, I came here to say I'm sorry, I never took your feeling into account when that whole thing happened, I never thought about if you liked someone else or if I was too young, and I'm sorry for not taking you feelings into consideration, I was a real jerk and blamed it all on you, but it's not your fault. I'm sorry," I said looking away cause I felt I was going to cry.

I heard him start to walk up to me. He put his hands on my shoulders and pulled me into a hug. "Hey, if I liked someone else, I wouldn't have played the game. It was kinda just like I was trying to get a grip on my feelings, I didn't know if I liked you more than then a friend or frat mate, because you had just got here and you were a little young and it was just all out of whack." He started

"I thought that there was no way that I could like someone I just met, so I yelled at you and took out all of my feelings on you, and I'm so sorry, I never should have done that, I asked for time and you gave that to me. You're kind and gentle and cautious, and it's so cute. I really do like you, I guess I just couldn't come to terms with my feelings." He said looking me in the eyes, I felt tears start to stream a little

I felt so relieved, he pulled away from the hug in favor of wiping my tears gently with his fingers. He looked down at me and gently pushed me into his bed, he hovered over me and looked into my eyes, I probably looked terrified to him, he kissed the bridge of my nose, "can I kiss you again?" He asked

I nodded. He leaned down and kissed me, it was soft and warm, just like the first time. It felt so nice and as soon as his lips touched mine all I felt was relief. I pushed him back with a little more force, then I asked for entrance this time, he let me in and I got to take a little dominance for once.