The Suju Games

Chapter 37: Kim Jaejoong & Kim Yesung

(Kibum) 

        The door swung open to reveal a suprisingly young looking man with sharp features, and even more suprising, he did not look the least bit like Kibum. 

        Father and son stared at each other for a long while, Kibum had not expected his father to look this young, he was around 30 to 32 now, right? Men that age did not normally look so strikingly handsome. Kibum's heart pounded in his chest, this was his father, the man who could not save his mother. Now that he had had that nightmare, he had some small memory of his mother, but he could not remember his father, not at all. 

        "Kibum? Is that ... really you?" Jaejoong whispered, his voice barely audible. 

        "Yes...father." Kibum said, slowly raising his gaze to meet Jaejoong's. 

        "You have grown." Jaejoong's voice was shaking with emotion, "The last time I saw you you were ... just a baby, a tiny baby," the last part came out like a sob as he threw his arms around Kibum's neck. 

        Kibum staggered under the weight, "Sorry, sorry." Jaejoong apologized, "Please, come into my room." Kibum followed his father into the room, it was just a normal room, nothing special, "Sit down, sit down." Jaejoong pulled out a chair for Kibum before sitting down himself. 

        They sat in awkward silence for a couple minutes, neither of them sure of what to say, until finally Kibum spoke up, "You know ...I was watching the Games...your games..." 

        Kibum nodded timidly, still speechless. He felt like he was going to be sick, he couldn't explain it, talking to Jaejoong the Victor who was also his dad was an indescribable feeling. 

        "I am sure," Jaejoong said with a proud smile stretching across his face, "That you would've won." 

        That didn't sit well with Kibum, for he loved his friends a lot, "We were all good." he defended his friends, when it came to his friends he could speak immediately. 

        Jaejoong continued to look proud, "Yes," he said, "But you were very fierce." 

        Is he glad to see me change and break down? Kibum wondered, thinking that the man must be crazy. It was definitely possible, Jaejoong had been in the Games, he had survived, and then his wife died and his child disappeared, why shouldn't he be crazy? 

        "I am glad to see that you are a fighter, I am happy to see that you dealt with your lovers death very well." 

        "He wasn't my lover." Kibum retorted, he knew that Jaejoong was talking about Sungmin, and he felt that he was being mocked, for Sungmin's real lover was Jaejoong's younger brother.

        Jaejoong shook his head, like Kids, they are so clueless. 

        That made Kibum even more angry, "He was your brothers lover." he said, his eyes went dark. 

     "Yesung? Nonsense." Jaejoong said, "It was quite obvious to me that Yesung loved that Sungmin boy as nothing more than a younger brother."

        "Don't try to make me feel better!" Kibum said, clenching his fists, "They loved each other and you know it! I'm glad that at least they got to die together." 

        "No you're not, you miss him." Jaejoong said sympathetically. 

        "I don't fucking miss him for fucks sake!" Kibum shouted, he quickly clapped his hand over his mouth as he realized that he was talking to his father. 

        "You've got spirit." Jaejoong said, studying his son, "You are more like your mother than me." 

        "No, I'm not." Kibum said straight away, he was sure that his dream was a real memory, and in that case it meant that his mother really was a lovely lady. And he was anything but lovely, more like deadly. 

        "How would you know? You were just a baby when she died." Jaejoong said mournfully. 

        Kibum thought of how sweet his mother was in his dream, if she really was like that in real life, then Kibum had once been like her. Once. When he was just a carefree boy, before he had been out into the Games as if he were an animal. Before the Games, oh my god... he was such a nice boy back then, and he knew it. 

        He remembered when Yesung had had trouble with archery during their training, and he had gone up to tease him about his short fingers and then dragged him over to the swordfighting station. Neither of them had known that they were cousins. Kibum closed his eyes and tried to remember that moment. 

Flashback 

          Kibum watched Yesung throw his boy and arrows down onto the ground.

        "Whats wrong?" He decided to ask the boy.

        "I can't do it." Yesung said, kicking the bow away. 

        "Its not a wonder you can't do it, your fingers are so short." Kibum teased. 

        "No they aren't!" Yesung argued. 

        Kibum laughed, "Yes, they are short and you know it." 

        "I doubt it has anything to do with the fact that I can't shoot." Yesung said. 

        Kibum shrugged, "Who knows? Just try alot of things and you'll see which one suits you." 

        "Thanks for the advice...I guess." Yesung said.

        "Hey, wanna join me at the sword station? It's the only station I haven't tried yet." Kibum invited him with a bright smile, he wanted to be friends with every single person in this room!

        "I- um- no- I mean-" Yesung protested.

        "It'll come in useful, I promise!" Kibum said as he dragged Yesung to that station.

End of Flashback

        "I had a dream last night, she was lovely and sweet, friendly and kind," Kibum told his father. 

        "And you are not?" 

        "I used to be," Kibum said truthfully, were children normally like this to their parents? Did they always tell the truth? "But the Games ruined me." he finished. 

        "They ruined everyone." Jaejoong said quietly, his face drooped sadly, "They took away my happiness and when I survived they took away my brother. If only he had lived in time for the Rebels to save him..."

        Kibum took this as his cue to leave, he bowed his head and rushed out of the room, his heart slamming against his chest, "He loves Yesung more than me." Kibum whispered to himself before his tears came yet again, "Just like Sungmin and everyone else." 

***

Poor Kibummie. why must I hurt him like this? :( :(. anyway sorry I couldn't put hyukjae into this chapter even though its his birthday! That's right peopleeeeee! HAPPY EUNHYUK DAYYYYY!!! HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MY ANCHOVY LOVE YA HYUK