CHAPTER 11

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"I had to come back to you! I made a mistake leaving you! I love you Jen!!" he said and tried getting closer to me but I moved away from him. Tears started falling and I didn’t know what to do. He hurt me so bad, but I loved him, I still love him. And he's here!

"Jennifer! I made a huge mistake! I thought having a good job was the most important thing in life but being there alone wasn't worth it! Not being able to spend time with you was awful!! I miss you Jen! Please give me another chance" he begged.

But what could I say? I just stood there staring at him not knowing what to do or say. I wanted him back. But after all that has happened how could I be with him and trust him?

"Jen? Is everything ok?" I heard Aarons voice and started to relax. Facing Chris alone scared me but now that Aaron came I knew it will be ok.

"Who is this?" he asked me and came to hug me. I saw Chris standing at the doorway shocked. He wasn’t used to people ignoring him. "Aaron this is my ex Chris" I said, hoping Chris will understand the ex part.

"C'mon Jen! I love you! I made a mistake!! But now I realized how stupid I was!! Please give me another chance!" he begged and I couldn’t help but start crying hard again. When he finished talking I ran into my apartment and left Aaron and Chris at the door.

I sat down on the couch and couldn’t stop crying. What should I do? I love Chris!! And it looks like he still loves me! But I can’t do this again! He already broke my heart so many times! A minute after I sat down on the couch Aaron came into the apartment. He sat next to me quietly waiting for me to talk. I told him all the thoughts and frights I had and he sat there and listened. Only when I finished talking he answered.

"You have 3 options here, and you need to choose. Only you know what is best for you. Option 1- you go out and make up with Chris and hope to be able to live happily ever after. Question is, do you think you could ever go back to what you were together before all this? Option 2- tell him its not happening and sit in the apartment all day and cry, or you could tell him it wont happen but instead of crying here we'll go out to eat and to the show and you'll have a distraction from all this. What do you think?"

I want to be with him like we used to be before everything" I said starting to relax "I’m sure you do, but do you think it can happen? That you'll ever be the same as before?" I’m tempted to say yes, but deep down I know that’s not the truth. I'll never be able to get over this and forgive Chris.

I can’t be with him" I whispered. "Ok. Do you want to go tell him? Afterwards we can decide if you like option 2 or 3 better" he asked still hugging me. "Come with me" I said. I knew I couldn’t face Chris alone. Aaron agreed and we got up and went to the door.

Chris was leaning on it with his face in his hands. It was so hard seeing him like that. I still love him. How can I tell him to go? Aaron must have sensed what I was feeling because he squeezed my shoulder to go on.

"Chris" I said quietly and he immediately stood on his feet. I looked into his eyes and I couldn’t tell him. I just couldn’t. I love him!! I stood there for another second trying to keep it together when I just couldn’t. I jumped on him and he hugged me back.

"I love you Jen! And I’m really really sorry for how stupid I was! It'll never happen again" he said while we were still hugging. It was so good to be there in his arms again. I didn’t want this moment to end. We stood there for a while just holding each other not wanting to let go. 

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