Towards the future I see

Chapter 43 Part 3

I stayed for a couple of days in Coruscant aiding Vader with a few things. But then he ushered me to go to the Chimaera. There was no need to ask why. He didn't give any additional orders or information. He simply reminded me of what he had said that evening.

It seemed like my stay in Chimaera hadn't changed. My quarters were once again close to Thrawn and from time to time he called me to his office either to speak and learn Sy Bisti or train in combat skills. He still made visits to my quarters when I didn't come to his office. And would have us sit in the common area and talk. What bothered me was that he now and then snuck his hand to caress my cheek or express fondness in other ways when I didn't expect it. He even invited me to dine with him in his suite. His show of our relationship was becoming more and more solid. I could tell it by the looks some officers gave me. They weren't improper ones but still made me feel like I was in trouble. Some were even extra kind to me.

Those who didn't show any kind of reaction or simply refused to acknowledge this "relationship", were very few. But among them was Pryce. She didn't voice her opinion but I could tell she didn't approve. Rukh, on the other hand, showed no change in behavior. He still snuck here and there and followed when I wasn't with Thrawn or in my quarters.

After some time had passed, I found myself traveling once again to Lothal. When I saw the planet from afar, my heart broke. I had seen that view before. The first time was when I was with Vader. The fires of burnt and barren land always brought back memories of my clan's destruction. Later, I saw the same scenes on worlds that were taken by the Empire, and the guilds took over the land and resources. I saw that same now on Lothal. The land was burned here and there and the sky got darker as the smoke rose up. The planet was locked uptight. Cruisers and Star Destroyers surrounded the planet from all sides. I had watched it all through the viewport until Thrawn called me to his office.

"The Tie Defender prototype is almost done. Commander Skerris shall test it." Thrawn said sitting behind his desk while I sat in front of the desk. "We will be going in a few days to see a demonstration of the new fighter."

"Understood," I said with a neutral tone.

"You are welcome to come and see the flight. We have added the improvements that Lord Vader recommended." Thrawn added. Instead of answering I just hummed as confirming that I had heard him. Then before I noticed it, he had stood up from his seat and come around the desk to stand next to me. "Is something troubling you, my Lady?"

"What?... Oh, forgive me, I... I... wasn't... listening." I admitted feeling embarrassed. "The TIE Defender will be something to look forward to."

Thrawn looked at me for a moment. Analyzing me as usual. To whatever conclusion he came he didn't show it.

"Very well, there are some matters that I need to take care of. You may leave to your quarters to rest." He said.

"As you wish, sir," I said and got up from my seat. Before I could turn to head out of the office Thrawn took my arm.

"And do rest, my Lady. The following days will be full of activities." Thrawn said.

I just nodded to his comment and left the office. We may have arrived at the Lothal's orbit but we will descend tomorrow to the surface. Now I took the opportunity to rest before I would have to ignore all the destruction of the planet's nature. Not all of it was burned or destroyed but it still made my mind wander to the sad past.

My rest was not of the good kind. I had a vision again. As with many visions, it was like I was a ghost standing at the side while everything happened in front of me. And when something terrible happened I couldn't look away. I wished I could do it. I saw the rebels' fleet charge at Lothal. But they failed. I see Hera barely surviving a crash only to be tortured for information by the Imperial officer. But that was not what I wanted to ignore. No, I knew the rebels would face this someday. What made me feel hopeless was seeing Kanan die. Many times when I have seen someone I know suffer or die, I have had the urge to reach out to them. But nothing would happen. I reached out to Kanan in the vision and saw fire go past my hand but all I felt was cold, so cold. But then I felt warm on my neck. For a moment I thought that I was feeling a ghost of the feeling of the fire I saw consume Kanan. But then, as if I had turned to face something behind me, I saw a huge wolf in front of me. The warmth that I felt on my neck was now on my face. It was the wolf's breath. It felt so real that it scared me. Then I heard the wolf growl and open its mouth and show its teeth. It was going to attack me. Just when I thought I would die, I woke up.