Memories (Lio Fotia x Female Reader)

Chapter 19

"Lio? Hey, are you there?" you asked.

He snapped out of his thoughts with a shocked look. He realised he was thinking and that he didn't say that phrase out loud.

"Actually, there was also another reason why I was that angry"

"...is everything okay?" you asked, worried about him suddenly being quiet.

You realised he was growing nervous. He was starting to breath faster than usual.

"Do you need a moment alone?" you suggested. You were afraid of doing something that would have made him more nervous than he already was.

He looked at you, both worried and nervous.

"Yes, please" he answered.

You left him, alone.

You returned in your own room. You were gazing at the sky outside, thinking about Lio.

Lio, your dear friend, Lio.

You started crying silently for no reason. When you realised it, you immediately wiped your tears away.

You were growing anxious for no motive. You tried to remain calm, but at some point, something unexpected happened.

You remembered something

"...please no! I promise I won't do it anymore! I beg you, DON'T BURN MY PAINTINGS!"

You stood there, in shock. You remembered yourself saying that, and the image it summoned.

You were in your room when you still lived in your apartment...how old were you, 13 years old?

It was still night. Your paintings were going on fire and you couldn't do anything about it. You could just watch then helplessly.

And then black out. You didn't remember anything else.

Actually no, there was another detail to it. Most of the paintings retracted a young boy with green hair.

It looked like the boy you saw in that dream the night before.

It looked like Lio.

Lio.

Your heart fluttered when you simply imagined him. And it started beating even faster.

You needed him. You needed him near you. You needed him sleeping with you every night. You needed him to reassure you.

You realised you needed him. You wanted him.

You realised you loved Lio.

And so, you started painting.

Meanwhile, in Lio's room

Lio laid down on his bed, facing the ceiling, with a hand on his eyes, and the other on his belly.

He was thinking.

Thinking about you.

He thought about telling you the truth. That you two have known each other since you were 13 years old.

He was getting a headache about it. When you didn't meet him in the park for the picnic, he even swore to burn the drawing you gave him. But whenever he tried, he just couldn't do it. Whenever he tried, he always remembered you. And later on, he surrendered to the idea of destroying it, and started instead to treasure it, even if he didn't want to. There was a part of him that wanted to treasure what you had left.

That day he even waited for you in the night, on the tree. He thought you forgot that you and him decided to do a picnic that day.

But you weren't there, even in the night.

Sure, he had considered the option of you having some troubles, and he was worried about it, but the possibility of you ignoring him started to undermine his heart.

He felt abandoned.

He left the park, and he never returned there.

Until that incident at your working place happened and he found you there.

The day before he was totally relaxed about telling you that you had known each other for so long, but your disappearing awakened in him a feeling he hoped he had forgotten: his fear of abandonment.

He thought about it. Did you disappear that day because he had done something awful to you before? If yes, telling you the truth and making you remember would make you run away from him again?

He was getting desperate for an answer. Would things change if he told you the truth? Would you go away like you apparently did when you were 13 years old?

The truth itself was hurting him.

For many years he tried to forget about you. Thinking about you brought so much pain. He had hope when he met you, and when you disappeared, so did his hope.

He only had hope for his own kind.

He just wished he could have more hope for you back then.

Whenever he tried to forget you, there was always a voice, a voice that resembled yours, that constantly said "Lio, hang on, don't forget about me!" and reassuring him, that you were there.

And now, he wanted to protect you and the bond you and him shared.

He also realised he had always loved you.

...

Days passed, and Lio started to ignore you.

He didn't show up much as he did in the past days.

You tried to help him, you thought he was sick, but whenever you approached him he would always give you a cold stare.

He probably thought that by ignoring you, his problem would have disappeared. Obviously, this didn't work, Lio always thought about you and his problem. Of course, you couldn't know this.

And at some point, you got tired.

If he didn't want your help, you would force him to be helped.