Eternally Yours

20) Namjoon - Daydream

Namjoon just couldn't focus. It was just one of those days. His brain was all over and it was a bit of a mess. He just couldn't organize any of his thoughts. Jackson especially knew this when he found his best friend sitting on the couch, staring off into space at the wall, this happened every now and again.

"Joon?" He asked as he carefully laid a hand on Namjoon's shoulder as to not scare the man.

"Hm?" The purple-haired man hummed, slowly pulling his eyes away from the wall to look at Jackson.

"You good?"

"Yeah." A small nod.

"Are you here with me?" Jackson asked carefully.

"Physically? Yep." Namjoon started. "Mentally? Eh." He hummed and turned his head back to the wall.

"Can ya clarify that for me buddy?" Jackson asked, sitting on the coffee table in front of him.

"It's a mess up there today, I can't focus," Namjoon stated quietly, his voice almost a whisper. Jackson almost couldn't hear him.

"Anything I can do to help this time?" Jackson knew how to handle these days, they happened enough for Jackson to put together a list of what helped and what didn't. His studies to become a therapist helped with these situations also.

"I don't know." Namjoon hummed and focused his mismatched eyes on the man sitting in front of him.

"Alright," Jackson hummed softly, thinking to himself about what would be the best option out of his helpful list to help his best friend today. "I'll be right back, ok?" After receiving a small nod, Jackson quickly got up and went off to Namjoon's room to find his notebook for days like this and a writing utensil of some sort. Returning to the living room with those items in hand.

"Here," Jackson held out the dark blue notebook that was worn around the edges, and a black gel pen to the man in front of him once he returned before sitting down on the coffee table again.

"Jot down some bullet points about what's going on up there in that head of yours for me, ok? And then we'll go from there." Jackson gently coaxed the somewhat fragile man in front of him, knowing this helped the man some.

Namjoon carefully took the items in hand, flipping to an empty page and starting to do what the brown-haired male in front of him asked him to. In his careful kinda loopy script, Namjoon gently wrote down the thoughts that kept swirling in his head, finally getting a chance to organize the mess.

Jackson watched as the words war, pain, fear, death, new friends, and partner took form on the empty page in a list. Fear being repeated a few times between the lines. This gave him an idea of what was troubling his best friend so much today.

Once Namjoon's hand stilled and he set the pen in the crease of the book, he looked up at Jackson. Dark brown orbs met the contrasting brown and blue shades that made up Namjoon's unique set of eyes.

"What's got you thinking about Jin and Mark?" Jackson asked first, deciding to start light before he got into the darker stuff.

"They're really cool. Jin has been around a few years longer than us, and I find that comforting. Mark might change my perspective on the human population of this world. He's a ball of sunshine and I find him to be really friendly." Namjoon explained, fiddling with his hands as he absentmindedly picked at the skin in his left palm. Jackson grinned softly at that answer.

"We'll have to hang out with them again sometime." The brunet hummed.

"Yeah," Namjoon nodded. "And I'm glad you finally found someone like Mark to get you to settle down. I can see how much you guys cherish each other when you look at one another." Namjoon said, indirectly knowing that he went to the next topic Jackson was going to confront, the word partner that he wrote. Jackson grinned widely at the compliment and then looked down at his hands.

"That- That means a lot Joon. Thank you." Jackson looked up to his best friend, finding the man smiling softly as he gave a gentle nod.

"Now," Jackson cleared his throat a little, hating that he had to kill the soft and gentle mood so quickly. "What's got you thinking of the past today buddy?" Jackson asked softly as a gentle and concerned look crossed over his features.

Namjoon visibly stiffened for a second, Jackson not missing the action. He also didn't miss the many flashes of different emotions flickering past Namjoon's eyes. Jackson could see the small war going on in his head.

"I-" Namjoon started, but the words died on his lips just as quickly as he started to speak. He then shook his head, hands coming up to rest on the sides of his head, fingers slightly weaving into his hair with his eyes clenching shut, all this happening within a matter of seconds.

"Hey hey hey, shhh. It's ok." Jackson gently murmured, his own hands coming to rest on Namjoon's wrists. "Deep breathes, Joon." Jackson coaxed Namjoon before the impending panic attack had a chance to surface its ugly head. Namjoon just brought his hands down and grabbed onto Jackson's, grounding himself to the real world instead of letting the dark abyss in his mind take over.

"It's ok. Remember where you are buddy. We're not there anymore, ok? That's all behind us, promise." Jackson mumbled, gently rubbing his thumb over Namjoon's hand to help the man calm down.

"I know," Namjoon whispered through an exhale. "I'm not there." He mumbled to himself, willing the demons away.

Jackson watched with a small, sad smile on his face. He hated seeing Namjoon like this on these types of days. But he knew that everyone had these days, no matter what. Especially vampires who have lived for centuries. Sometimes the good outweighed the bad. Yet, Jackson had faith in his best friend, he knew how strong Namjoon was. The purple-haired male never let things like this weigh him down, he always fought through his struggles and Jackson found that to be admirable.

When asked who the strongest person he knows, Jackson always answered 'My best friend, Kim Namjoon' without a moment's hesitation because it was true. He truly was the strongest person Jackson ever had the chance to meet when he was merely 2 years old.

They would just have to fight through the scary daydreams together. Until the end.