Now's Your Chance!!! Spamton x Reader

Ode To A Lemonade Stand

You're in the back of Spamton's shop, on your side and covered in newspapers. There's a tattered cushion beneath your head, keeping your head from the cold floor beneath.

You must have passed out at some point. 

You try to move, to sit up, but it feels as though your brain was rolled around in a pile of glass shards. It feels much better to lie still. 

Regardless, the rustling of the newspapers over you alerts Spamton, who had been sitting at his desk. In an instant, he's at your side, eyes worried.

"You're awake!!!! Kid, don't [[He@lth Concerns?]] me like that!!" He rubs at his temples, toothy mouth twisted in a frown. 

He paces in front of you. The motion is difficult for you to follow without pain, so you close your eyes. You can still hear the tap-tap-tap of his feet on the ground, though, and his voice to go with it.

"Do you need a [HAPPY HOUR]? You [[little sponge]]s need that, right? I know I've got a Dr.[PIPIS] around here somewhere..." He scurries off. You can hear the tinny pop of empty soda cans being crushed, and the clang of them being tossed to the side. Spamton lets out a frustrated grunt, and then... more scurrying. Tap-tap-tap-tap-tap. The squeak of a desk drawer opening.

Spamton returns to your side.

"I've got [[JUST THE THING YOU NEED]]!! Open wide for [[Free Delivery With Every Order Over $39.99!!!]]!"

You really are parched, and you still don't want to open your eyes with his constant motion. Whether it's water or Dr.Pepper or whatever else he's got, you choose to trust him, and you open your mouth.

You shouldn't have. The liquid that hits your tongue feels like electricity and sharp corners in the worst possible way. You swallow on instinct to make the feeling go away and you instantly regret it, trying to spit it out. Needless to say, your eyes are open now.

"-Spamton," you choke, gagging on the drink. Your stomach is already churning. "What was that?!"

He laughs cheerily. "That was the SMOOTH TASTE OF!! Smooth Potion!! It affects HP a lot!!!! [Positive Reviews], right?! I [[5 STARS]] the stuff!!" In his hand is a bottle full of a vibrantly colorful not-quite-liquid. It seems to be made of squares, although you don't have long to see it, since he chugs down the rest of the bottle. 

He gags.

"-A taste so smooth, you'll never be [[Dying]] again," he says with a forced smile.

You chuckle, but the taste of the stuff comes back up your throat again and you have no intentions of throwing up in his shop. You fall silent.

You can't afford to waste time. You have to tell him what you saw, before.

"...Spamton, we-"

He's listening raptly, but then there's a knock at the door. His head snaps up and whips around, and then he sprints for the door. He opens it with a wide smile, his eyes flicking only once to you and then back to whoever was at the door.

"HEY HEY h3Y!! Whaddaya know!! A [[beloved customer]]!! Welcome, welcome!!" He ushers in a Darkner you've never seen before- hot pink, smiling, holding a spear of some kind.

Spamton darts to his desk, taking his place on his stack of books. He gestures for the Darkner to sit on the folding chair in front of him. You have a good view, and thus, the Darkner should have a good view of you, too, but they don't seem to notice. They keep looking behind them, as if, despite the door being closed, someone could be following.

It's a perfect opportunity for you to watch Spamton in his element. 

"What can I do for you, [[Guest Account]]-"