ENDURING {Sequel to Everlasting} ❗️EDITING ❗️

Chapter 82

Please...please...I'm sorry! Please, come on...just breathe. The plea of desperation and agony whispers through my skull, jolting me awake.

"Hardin?" I breathlessly whisper, calling his name in the darkness of the room.

But he doesn't answer. I reach for the lamp, switching it on. The light burns my eyes and makes my head pound, but the room is empty, and I'm alone. Again. Heading into the bathroom, I wash away the dry tears and brush my teeth, spraying a little perfume to hide the slight smell of alcohol.

It's almost eight, Hardin will be with the other Alphas relaxing before everyone heads home in the morning. The past few days have been more hectic than I thought they would be, the rogue issue was easily handled, but Hardin and I?

There's still this tension.

Shaking off my thoughts, I clear my head and exit the bedroom. Lucifer isn't with me, so I assume he's with Hardin.

I find them all in the same room as last time, though the females stay clear of all the Alphas. It's intimidating, seeing all four men sat talking like the outside world didn't exist.

Hardin's grey eyes flicker to mine as I enter the room, but I glance away, my chest tightening slightly.

"You okay?" Seb asks me with a smile, shifting so I can sit next to him.

"I'm fine." I smile warmly, tucking my knees up and wrapping my arms around myself.

I feel Hardin's eyes on me, but I couldn't look at him. I don't want to ruin the last night here.

"No headache?" Maddox questions, chuckling.

"Slightly." I muse.

The conversation picks up, and they talk about random shit like cars or their packs, neither of which I pay any attention to. My mind drifting elsewhere, and nowhere.

"You sure you're good?" Seb murmurs, nudging his elbow against my leg.

I meet the concerned eyes of my little brother, and I offer a soft smile, even if it's forced. Am I good? No, I'm not.

"Yeah, I'm good." I assure him.

"Can I get you a hot chocolate?" The way he looks at me, I know he sees right through my words. He just doesn't want to push when I'm not ready to confess what's bothering me.

My eyes sting slightly, but I blink quickly. "Yes please." I whisper to him.

Seb smiles sadly, giving my hand a gentle squeeze as he gets up and leaves the room. No one notices him go, or as I drift off into my own world, staring blankly at the wall as a thousand tears and whispers echo through my head.

Something blocks my vision, grabbing me gently and pulling me to my feet. I snap out of my mute staring, glancing at Hardin with a deep frown as he takes the spot I was just sat.

"Come here." Hardin softly says, uncaring for the Alphas that are watching us. I almost flush, because neither of us are ever like this in front of anyone except the pack.

But I still slide onto his lap, sitting sideways with my legs tucked up. Hardin's arms wrap around me in a way that makes me feel safe. Suddenly the last few days melt away.

I bury my face into his shoulder, inhaling his cologne that lingers on his shirt. The smell is enough to ease some of the pain.

"Here." Seb says, holding out a grey mug. I can smell the chocolate already.

"Thank you." I smile, taking the mug, noticing it has exactly ten marshmallows floating on the top.

I glance at Seb as he sits a little past my feet, and he flashes a smile. Knowing it's habit from being kids, I'd always tell him not to put the marshmallows on because they were too sticky once they melted, he said that the marshmallows would help glue me back together. I never had the heart to tell him that I wasn't broken, that I didn't need gluing together.

Perhaps I could use more marshmallows now that I've felt the full wrath of life.

"The dreams are back." I faintly murmur against his shoulder, feeling him tense slightly at my words.

"The she-wolf?" He asks gently, knowingly.

I give a faint nod, closing my eyes as I visibly feel some of the weight lift off my chest.

"I wish I could see what you see." He whispers to me, his lips against my forehead.

"Me too." I sigh. To have such a thing, I'd need my wolf, and she's long gone.

"Seb makes the best hot chocolate, try it." I encourage Hardin a minute later, bringing my mug to his face.

Even though he doesn't like sweet things, he sips the hot drink. The marshmallow sticks above his lip, and without thinking, I lean in and lick it off.

Hardin's eyes instantly darken, and widen in surprise, while his cheeks flush a shade of pink. I cover my mouth to hide my laughter, realising that everyone saw it because there's a sudden loud silence around the room.

And then they're laughing hysterically, at Hardin's expense.

He lets out a deep throaty groan of embarrassment, though makes no attempt to push me off and leave the room.

"You do it to me!" I defend.

"It's sexy when a man does it, Kat, but that...was just wrong." Seb pipes up, before howling with laughter.

I raise my eyebrow. "Really? Last time it was ice cream, and Hardin bent me-"

His hand covers my mouth, and the Alphas snort with laughter knowing what I was about to say. I don't think it helped Hardin's case, especially since he didn't let me finish.

"Where's your filter, woman?" Maddox asks me with a raised eyebrow.

"Just being honest." I retort, settling against Hardin's chest as I sip my hot drink.

I stop paying attention to their conversation soon after, my mind once again drifting. I worry for the she-wolf. Now that she has no mate, and no child, she'll find something else to occupy her time and mind. A distraction.

What if that distraction is to kill? What if she turns into...me?

After a while Hardin and I head to the kitchen for food, before packing away our belongings and getting an early night.

Even wrapped in the warmth of his arms and knowing I'm completely safe, the dreams wake me. I find comfort in Hardin's whispers, the way he holds me against his chest as if to protect me from the world.

It's almost ironic, the world once needed protecting from me. Now it's me that needs protecting from myself, I'm my own worst enemy. Perhaps it's a fate well deserved given who I am, what I have done.