ENDURING {Sequel to Everlasting} ❗️EDITING ❗️

Chapter 4

"I know you said you're not going to the ball, but just in case you change your mind, I thought you might like this." Lucien explains first as he enters my room.

I just chuckle and shake my head, they're stubbornness is not a joke. For four years I have refused to go to any ball held here, and every year they bring me a whole outfit. Just in case.

The gesture is sweet, but it annoys me a little because I've told them several times now that I'm not going.

"I won't, but thank you." I tell him.

The second my door is shut, I get up and put the outfit in the back of my closet, with the other three outfits still sat untouched. They're in protective bags, I don't think I've ever even looked at the dresses or anything, I just put them in the closet.

Out of sight, out of mind, right?

Today I work in my room, taking phone calls and creating files to organise myself a little better. The amount of people that are willing to pay me just to hunt someone down is insane. But I have to prioritise my jobs, meaning that I'll put rape, murder, abuse, kidnapping, all before a simple search for someone without a solid reason.

It does mean less money, but it also means I sleep at night.

Between phone calls, tending to Apollo and dealing with the jobs from the Elders, the whole Christmas ball happening in two days simply slips from memory.

The last and only Christmas I've ever had, was with Hardin. It's never meant anything to me, and Hardin made it special, and now that's gone, it's hard to enjoy something when the reason you love it isn't with you anymore.

"Kali!" Lucien's voice echos, like a parent calling their child down for dinner. That's what he's calling me for, dinner.

Finishing up my phone call, I head downstairs to eat with them. They make a huge deal if I skip a meal.

As I enter the dining room my stomach begins to growl, signalling my hunger as I take a seat. Like everyday, food is placed lavishly along the centre of the table so everyone can help themselves. Sometimes I'm sort of glad I don't have much of an appetite, it would be embarrassing to eat more than the Elders.

I fill my face for their benefit, knowing they're watching how much I'm eating. Right now they're already on my back as it is, I can't deal with anymore pressure off them right now.

With a bloated stomach, I head upstairs some time later to get back to work. Tomorrow I have to drive out to Florence to see Emily, considering I've already changed the date once on her I don't want to make it a habit.

*
*

"Ok, I'll see what I can do and get back to you in a couple of weeks." I say.

Emily smiles appreciatively. "No problem, thank you so much for doing this, I really appreciate it."

"It's no problem, I'm happy to help." I offer a smile, even if it's forced she doesn't notice.

Emily and I hug before we part ways, instead of driving all the way home, I book into a nearby hotel for the night.

There's no doubt in my mind that Florence is a beautiful place, the buildings are just gorgeous. But being here alone? It takes away the joy, and it dulls the beauty just enough to make me realise how empty, and lonely I really am.

I don't even have the comfort of my wolf anymore. In a way I do feel some regret, mostly because I know leaving hurt a lot of people. But it wasn't wise to stay, and I certainly wasn't in the right state of mind to say goodbye.

I gave up on the only good thing I had.

Leaving Hardin behind wasn't even the most painful part, it was abandoning Jackson. Jackson, the one that has never once believed that I'm dead, never gave up hope, never left me, not even when I left him first.

Yet I still do nothing.

I work, and I just about exist in a world that is far bigger than me.