Unknown Desire

Leah:The club

We arrive at the club after nearly falling flat on my face and Tom catching me I'm feeling a bit HOT and BOTHERED. This man keeps rescuing me. How can this be the same man that was in that room inflicting pain on a woman.
It's like jekyll and Hyde.
I tell myself to keep an open mind. It's not as if Tom has asked you to take part in this world. But what if he wants to whip you like that girl. What if he loses control. What then, again so many questions.
Are you OK Leah his voice brings my attention back to the present.
Yes I say but I don't sound sure. I hear the uncertainty in my voice.
We can leave at anytime Leah just say the word. We can stay here in the office and talk if you want. This is all on your terms. If your not comfortable just say. I want you to trust me when I tell you that. Honesty is a big part of this. Honesty and trust.
OK I say let's have that drink and talk for abit.
OK he says and goes to get us a drink. As he leaves the room I take my shoes off. And head to the bathroom the door has been fixed. Inside however not so much. When I come out he is still not back. I head back to the couch. When my curiosity gets the better of me.
I head to the closet. It is still the same as the last time. I now have the feeling the random chair is not actually random after all . I trail my fingers along it. Its cold to touch but soft I sit on it and wonder how he uses it. I stand and go to the drawers I open them. I see the blindfold and take it out its soft satin touch feels so sensual. I notice there are different types of masks as well as cuffs I run my fingers over them. Imaging what it would be like to be tied up and blindfolded by Tom. I can feel the heat rising in my core. When I hear a voice behind "see anything you like"
I jump and drop the blindfold.
Tom walks over and picks it up i can feel his breath on my legs as he slowly bends down. And then again as he stands up.
Sorry I say I shouldn't be snooping thats very rude of me. I'm slightly fluster at being caught.
I don't mind he says.
So how about we start here. What do you want to know about this room and what you've found.
I flush bright red, i'm stuck for words I need a drink.
Em I'm not sure what to ask Tom I think that's half the problem I say awkwardly.
OK well i'll start and if you have any questions jump in.
OK I nod.
So in this drawer there is blindfolds and masks,gags and cuffs. There made from different materials. Different materials can add to the pleasure. Like silks and satins are soft and sensual. Leather is a little more naughty. Depends on the game your playing.
What kinda games do you play i say barely a whisper. Tom looks at me it depends on the person. Some can be planned, some games just happen. They can vary. Alot of these games are about the senses. The blindfolds heighten the senses and you can't see so you can only feel the persons touch. So you are opening your trust to this person and allowing them access to your body. Your body reacts to the teasing of little kisses on certain parts of the body. Also the use of toys. You can also be tied up or cuffed. Totally surrendering yourself to the game thats being played. Again this is all about trust and can be exhilarating.
You would be surprised at how you can have multiple orgasams without actually having sex.
I feel my breathing increase with his words my heart is pounding my pants are drenched.
He looks at me and says how about that drink. I nod and make my way to the door relieved to be leaving the closet before I tell him to tie me to the godamn chair and do whatever he wants.
We walk out and sit on the couch. I take a big gulp of my drink and nearly choke on it.
Tom looks at me any questions yet.
Nope I say trying to regain my composure.
So how have you been Leah.
OK once I got over the shock of Sunday. I'm sorry Leah I should have been honest with you from the start.
Don't be silly Tom, we knew each other two days. What kinda girl throws herself at someone they met 5 minutes previously.
Tom frowns when I say this. Leah never apologise for what you want.
I certainly am not sorry for sleeping with you .why do you feel ashamed of it. It was beautifully intense and one of the best weekends I've ever had up until Sunday that is. Society tells you to be ashamed for having desires. Why ? Fuck what people think Leah if it makes you happy who cares. This world can be so freeing if you let it. But it's not for everyone and that's also ok.
I'm not really sure what I want Tom. I'm clearly very inexperienced in the world. Obviously there is an attraction between us Tom. There is no denying that. But I'm lost when it comes to all this. Maybe I'm afraid to let go. I'm afraid of being hurt if I'm being honest. What if we are better as friends.
Tom sits and listens as I ramble on. I finally say what if its only a weekend fling for you.
Leah he says i can tell you now,I like you I like you alot. I'm not going to lie i don't know where this could go. But I'm keen to get to know you. I really enjoy your company. So how about we just let it be what it is for the moment and if it develops it develops no pressure on either side.
And in a few weeks if you wanna just be friends thats fine.
But what about all this i ask, he replies thats up to you Leah. I would never force you into anything if thats what your worried about. No no it's not Tom I say. But what if I'm not enough for you. What then, do you set up contracts with other women while your with me. How does it work Tom, I say slightly irritated.
Leah I don't know is the honest answer but i will never want to intentionally hurt you. So we will take it slow if that's what you want.
I feel so confused I really like him but not sure I can give myself to him in the way he might need.
I'm scared of falling for him and being hurt because I'm not enough for him.
Tom can see my inner struggle, Leah I think you are over thinking this. Do you want to go see the club or are you happy to stay here.
I'm not sure Tom my head is spinning from all these questions.
Maybe I should head home. If that's what you want leah, I will drop you home.
Yeah I think so...