The Ex Files

Andrezej's Special Coffee

"This is a really nice home," Kelly said to Rolf. "You're a lucky guy. You're going to have an excellent summer before you start school."

"I think I will enjoy it immensely," Rolf answered. "I can't believe that this is my last week of wrestling with furniture and boxes. I'm going to have to spend a lot of time at the fitness centre to keep from getting soft. I've signed up for a couple of on-line biology courses that I can complete at my own pace. I don't think I can get university credit for them, but they will give me a head start. The pre-requisites for vet school are really intimidating."

"It will be strange living in a retirement community. I'm surprised they will even let you be here."

"Officially, I am Dziadek's attendant. If I am away, he will hire an agency replacement."

She and Rolf were cleaning up after the inaugural dinner at his grandfather's new lodgings at Shangri-La Village. Andrzej had excused himself to attend a bridge tournament, and told them to stay as long as they wanted and let themselves out when they were ready to go home, because it would be close to midnight when he returned.

When they arrived, Andrzej had given them the grand tour of his new place. It was small, but not cramped. The furniture was simple, avant-garde teakwood, totally different from the heavy Victorian pieces in his old house. Both bedrooms featured double beds. Andrzej had asked Kelly to stock the kitchen, and had given her a free hand, specifying that he preferred bold, simple designs with no floral motifs. The resulting shopping spree had been a lot of fun, and Andrzej had been delighted with her puchases. Their first dinner together had been a grand celebration, featuring a rather pungent home-made wine which a friend had given Andrzej as a housewarming gift.

Kelly hung up her apron and surveyed the kitchen. "I don't think there is anything more that we can do here. Do you want to leave, or hang out here for a while?"

"Let's sit in the living room and talk. We hardly ever get the chance to be alone."

Kelly's heart fluttered. She knew exactly what she wanted to do for the next couple of hours. But was Rolf ready, willing and able?

This is a golden opportunity for The Talk. But if it goes badly, it will ruin the whole evening. Maybe I should wait. But if not now, then when?

After they snuggled up on the love seat, Rolf launched into a lengthy monologue about the complications of the Move of the Day. Kelly put her head on his shoulder and started drifting off into a delightful fantasy of her own.

"Kelly?" Rolf's voice cut into her dream. "Kelly – are you awake?"

She snapped into consciousness. "Sorry. That wine was rather strong. And Anrzej's special coffee ... was really special."

"You're right. I don't think there was much coffee in it. I'll need some regular coffee before I try to drive home."

"I guess we could call a cab," Kelly said. "I never imagined that we would need a designated driver after a meal with your grandfather. It's strange, but I have this mental stereotype of the drinking patterns of senior citizens.  I thought they didn't indulge in anything more than medicinal brandy and an occasional glass of wine."

"The safest thing would be to spend the night here."

Kelly sat up straight. "You – me – in the double bed?"

"Am I rushing things?" Rolf asked. "If I am, we can forget all about it. Blame it on the special coffee."

"Actually, I thought you'd never ask."

Rolf gave a little chuckle. "I can't believe I finally did it. I've always been really shy around girls. I have grandiose fantasies when I'm alone, but as soon as I'm with a girl, I freeze up."

OMG, is Rolf a virgin? I never even considered the possibility.

She searched for a tactful way to approach the subject, and decided that the only workable strategy was to ask directly. "Are you trying to tell me that you've never slept with a woman?"

Rolf shook his head. "I didn't know where to start."

Kelly threw her arms around him, limp with relief. "I had no idea! I was worried that ... that ... you weren't interested."

Rolf pulled her closer. "I'm more interested than I have ever been in my life. Are you a virgin?"

Oops. Truth or dare.

"Far from it."

Rolf smiled. "Wonderful! You can teach me."

Kelly rubbed his back gently. "Let's start the first lesson now. Don't worry if you don't catch on right away. We can repeat as often as necessary."

Rolf blushed. "I can't even put a condom on properly."

When Andrzej Wienczyslaw returned from the bridge tournament and the social evening that followed, Rolf's car was still parked in front of his house. He slipped inside quietly, smiling. He couldn't resist peeking into the spare room. The youngsters were blissfully asleep.

Andrzej made himself a nightcap and parked in his recliner. His plan had unfolded perfectly. He had been worried about Rolf and his lack of amorous encounters. Andrzej had made peace with his own sexual orientation long ago, but he was not entirely satisfied with the limitations it had imposed on his life. His deepest regret was that he had not experienced the privilege of fathering children that were his and his spouse's own flesh and blood.

The most agonizing experience of his life was watching his beloved Jolanta growing older without a baby at her breast. His skarbie – his treasure – never complained, but he could see that there was a gaping hole in her heart because she would never be the mother of her very own child. Once, he had suggested that a beautiful woman like her could easily find someone to get her pregnant. "Any child of yours would be a child of mine," he said, stretching out his arms. "Though that child be as ugly as your cousin Katrine or as feeble-minded as your nephew Marek, I would always be a proud father."

Jolanta looked so shocked that he expected a terrible fight. But she understood that he spoke from love, and answered him accordingly. "You are my husband, and I belong to you completely. There can be no other. If God wants me to have a child, He will make it possible."

They wept in each other's arms and never spoke of the matter again. But now, when he visited Jolanta's grave, he often had angry words with the God she trusted so much. It was a great comfort to him to know that Rolf's marriage would be different.