FIONA | ✔️

Chapter 38(Part 2)

“I want to see my friends.” I told my therapist at the beginning of our session and the smile on her face made her look like she had found the cure to cancer.

“That’s great news Fiona!”

I’d spent two weeks being away from school and my friends but I’d also spent two weeks with family members who never took their eyes off of me.

I stayed in my room for a day before Debbie came to my room to drag me out saying she wasn’t going to let me sink into the black hole.

Even though I was staying with Derek and my sister, my parents and my grandma always seemed to be around and Debbie had finally moved in fully mostly because I was there and she wanted to keep an eye out for me.

Derek’s twin sister, Danielle had come to visit twice with her kids and they were such bundles of joy along with Harry, I couldn’t help but laugh.

It had taken me a week before I started to become my old happy self again coupled with constant sessions with my therapist.

The first week was hell for me. I had nightmares and Alex’s hurt look kept haunting me.

I’d laughed, I’d cried and countless times I’d gotten so angry and frustrated but I was better.

“What do you think changed?” She asked making me give her a thoughtful look.

“Five years ago, my parents were in a bad place so I barely existed to them, my sister was gone and the only person I had was Emily but she was just a young girl so she couldn’t handle everything on her own so I guess in a way, I got to a really bad place back then because I didn't have anyone to drag me out. Emily tried but I was just too heavy for her to pull all by herself.

Now my sister’s here, my parents are more involved than they’ve ever been, my Nana is constantly around and I’ve only known Derek and his family for a short time but I love them.”

“Sometimes, all you need is love.” She said with a smile and I nodded.

“This morning, I stumbled upon my videos with my friends I spent hours watching them and looking at pictures of my friends and our time together right from Hannah’s wedding down to the night of the party. I cried at the videos from my birthday especially and when the part of Alex and I came up, I’d sobbed harder.

My sister was worried that something was wrong but when she saw what I was watching, she suggested that maybe it was time for me to come out of hiding and go see my second family.”

“I agree with your sister.”

“I’m going to start with Emily. I feel like she already hates me because I’m the worst best friend in the world for ghosting her for almost a month but I’m hoping she’ll forgive me.”

“I’m rooting for you Fiona.” She told me with a proud smile.

“Thank you.”

“And what about Alex?” She asked and I let out a scared breath.

“I’m really scared of seeing him again. I said hurtful things when we last saw and I hurt him badly. What if he can’t get over it and he doesn’t forgive me?” I asked nervously.

“You were speaking from a place of hurt Fiona. I feel like a part of him might understand but he might also be mad at you which he’s allowed to because he’s only human. Let’s just be prepared for the worst and hope for the best because this is bound to happen whether we like it or not.” She said and I nodded slowly.

And I knew she was right.

I was in a better place emotionally, physically and mentally and I knew my friends probably wouldn’t welcome me with open arms but I was ready to beg if that meant they’d be my friends again.