𝕊𝕒𝕕 𝕤𝕠𝕝𝕓𝕪 𝕠𝕟𝕖𝕤𝕙𝕠𝕥𝕤 ♡

8yearswhereilovedyouthemost

Summary

Only love could hurt like this

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It all hurt. Everything in Colby's body hurt.
He watched as the love of his life, his other half, mingled and laughed with another with eyes so full of love it made his own look dull.

He watched, and watched, till the pain in his heart couldn't take it anymore. Sam loved like he was placing rocks on the ocean surface, easily, precise, and so so gentle . He just had no clue how deep those rocks sank.

Colby loved so closely, Sam was so heartbreakingly in reach, so close for him to touch, to grab onto. He wanted to reach out and explain to Sam that he didn't need her if he was there. That she could never love him as vastly and deeply as he could.

But the salt from rejection kept him at arms length, it would sting the open wound of his heart, still opening up with hope that someday Sam could be his.

So instead he pushed down his heartache, looked back into the crowd and smiled, even if Sam wasn't looking at him, he was still smiling at her, and seeing sam smile would always make Colby smile.

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Colby continued to watch from the sidelines with shoulders heavy with anguish, each time he watched his other half become whole with another, it made the weight on his body unbearable.

He couldn't stand watching them together.
He couldn't stand hearing him gush over her with his eyes so filled with light.

Because even if Colby wanted to be happy for him, and he was, he couldn't stop the pain in knowing that the light that built him up to who he was now, had moved on to do the same for her.

He wanted Sam for himself, he was selfish in ways he knew he couldn't be, because Sam was never his to begin with.

He sometimes wonders what could of happened if he stoped with all the 'what ifs and just went for it.

How differently his life would be

How much pain he could of avoided

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Colby wanted to talk about it, hell he wanted to scream it. He wanted to shout his love so loudly everyone who tried to look sams way would know he was his.

He was tired of whispering "I'm fine" every time she walked into the room.

He was tired of seeing them happy together, knowing it should be him in her place.

It's always been hard making decisions in Colby's life, but when he met Sam there was no hesitation, no second thought, he was it for him, it's always been that way

So having to sit back and watch him fall in love with someone else hurt, and no matter how hard he tried he couldn't stop himself from continuing to reach out.

Continuing to stay close even though it hurt like hell, he was going to fight to stay by sams side, until one day he wouldn't have to anymore.

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Colby would never admit it aloud, but he was so fucking tired.

Sam was always a constant in his life, always around every corner, every obstacle, every downhill. He was always there to help Colby gather himself back up and shower him in love so warming it would chase away any doubt Colby had within himself.