𝕊𝕒𝕕 𝕤𝕠𝕝𝕓𝕪 𝕠𝕟𝕖𝕤𝕙𝕠𝕥𝕤 ♡

Red ruby roses

Mentions of death
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Feet traveling one step at a time colby let his hands fall at his sides, the small boutique of red ruby roses tucked neatly between his slim fingers making others walking past smile fondly. Parting his way through the all to familiar hallways colby wasn't even fazed by the toxic smell of cleaning supplies or anti bacteria wipes anymore. It all seemed all too normal to him, which is sadly the sad part. Smiling at one of his favorite nurses Colby nodded his head once with a sweat smile, the nurse in baby blue scrubs waving with a grin.

Nearing the elevator Colby waited patiently for the doors to open. Watching as a woman and three kids walked out, all ghost white with tear stained cheeks the brunette quickly moved out of there way, the woman letting out a choked sob into her handkerchief. Feeling his heart ache at the sight Colby tried his best to keep his upbeat smile. It's what Sam loved to see. Walking into the small traveling box Colby let his head fall the second he doors closed, an exhausted sign escaping his frail lips.

Leaning against the elevators door Colby softy pressed floor four, his slim fingers jabbing the button with ease. Closing his eyes as the elevator started to move Colby prayed that he didn't cry this visit, that he was strong enough to get through this. He had to be, Sam would of wanted that.

Letting the bing! Of the doors take him from his darkness Colby opened his glossed over eyes with a deep breath. He had to stay strong. Gripping hold of the ruby roses Colby walked out of the elevator slowly, like something was telling him not to go into the room, not to see his lover. Brushing those thoughts aside colbys sweet and well played out smile smacked back onto his face when a male doctor passed. Making eye contact with the elder Colby tightened his smile, praying that it looked real.
Not seeming to find any difference in real or fake the doctor just nodded nicely, he had better things to do then hunt down people faking there happiness.

Smile flattering the second the doctor wasn't in view the slow paste broken boy made a quick right into the ICU unit. Pushing open the double doors of the hall Colby let the sound of multiple beeps and other computer sounds work it's way through his ear drums. He was so sick and tired to hearing those sounds, the sounds that told one if they were dead or alive.

Letting his eyes scan over the vigors doors of different patients rooms Colby managed to choke back a small cry when he came out side of Sams door. Looking at the smooth white shade of wood Colby let his eyes seep into the clear window just to his left. Looking inside Colby could already see Sams weak heart monitor, surrounding the huge machine, dozens of dead or dying red ruby roses.

Closing his eyes as the familiar sting of tears pricked his vision Colby fanned himself to stop his leaking lids, he promised himself he wouldn't cry. He couldn't.

After collecting himself for what felt like hours Colby finally found it in himself to open the door, to do the job. Pushing open the light wood colbys eyes betrayed him the moment he stepped foot into the cold room. Letting his heart sink as the roses in his hands tightened Colby slapped a weak hand over his slacked jaw. The sight of his baby surrounded by machines and connected to multiple different breathing tubes making him want to scream at god for ever letting his baby get this bad.

Sam had developed cancer just last year. It was hard on Sam but harder on colby. He couldn't bare the thought of loosing his best friend even worse his lover. He made Sam a promise that he would try his best not to be sad and look at the bright side of things. But now that it was little over a year later and Sam was basically dead if it wasn't for the life support Colby had placed him on there didn't seem like any bright sides. His baby was dying and there was nothing he could do about it.

Colby broke down in tears as he set Sams ruby roses onto his lap, Sams cold hands and motionless body making him hicup in pain. How could someone so special, someone so good, so full of life be taken from this world.
Colby wished that it was him laying there instead of his beloved.

He wishes that Sam was still by his side at this moment, that they were laughing and having fun like they used to. The day that they found out about Sams cancer was the worse day ever. It had been on there anniversary and Sam collapsed half way through diner.

When he had woke up doctors had already run many test, the deviating news of brain cancer making them both weak in each other's arms.

Wiping at his eyes Colby took in deep strong breaths, he couldn't beat himself up over something completely out of his control.

Feeling his clumped lashes spike towards the beeping of the heart monitor just left to him Colby crumbled his fist together when he glanced down at the life support plug. Today was the day he's been dreading for months now, it was time to pull the plug.

Colbys been working three jobs a day just to afford his baby's life support treatments. He's spent every cent in his pocket but now there wasn't any to spend. He was fired from his jobs once crying on the daily and skipping work due to mental health issues weren't considered "expectable excuses"

Doctors had inform the smaller just this morning that if he didn't pull the plug, then they will. The news broke colby and he almost didn't come, how could he? How could he live with himself knowing that he's the one who killed his best friend, his everything. Sams been in a medical coma for weeks now. Everyone saw this coming, seeing the day were Sam would no longer be on this earth surrounded by the people he loved.

His cancer had developed over night it seemed. After doctors fully looked over his body and the CT scans they were bazzled that Sam was still alive. He went through painful surgery's and painful treatments but his body just wasn't strong enough. Putting his baby in a coma was the only thing keeping him at bay from the pain, but now he won't be in pain ever again.

Looking down at the plug with pure hated colbys fingers dug into them selves making him wimpier out strong wheezes. How could he pull the only thing keeping his baby alive, why didn't he work harder so he could have the money to keep him here. Why did Sam have to love a failure. A person so lost and so broken that they can't even function properly without him.

Choking on sobs the brunette glanced over towards his baby, the ruby red roses surrounding him making him look like a angel.

Sam loved roses, his face would always glow and beam with excitement whenever colby would pick up a bunch and dose his baby in them. Roses were Sams favorite thing, he loved the way they looked and the meaning behind them. He loved the love and intimacy they brought whenever someone would receive them. And he loved the way they made Colby feel whenever he would praise his baby in kisses for buying them for him.

But now colby doesn't get any kisses, any hugs, any beaming looks. He comes everyday with a new boutique of Sams favorite ruby red roses and showers them onto his lover like he used to do. He misses Sam oh so dearly, the pain that sinks into his chest spreading to his fingers and toes kills him everyday. He knows Sams just a wondering mind, he would never wake up due to the coma doctors placed him in unless he got better, but he couldn't get better.

Letting his lips trace over Sams Colby placed a delicate kiss upon his beauty's forehead, his sobs coming to a painful stop as he whispered faith into his beauty's cold ear.

"In love may y-you leave the shore" shaking Colby grabbed hold of The plug connecting all of the machines to his baby's body. "In death may you find the next" kissing Sams nose Colby whimpered, his eyes closing. "S-Safe passages on your travels, u-until we meet again" pulling softy on the cord Colby placed a delicate kiss onto Sams lips, the spark they've shared for years being no more. "Let the ruby red roses guide you home, until I join you soon, may peace and light c-consume you, in heaven you shall go"

And with a finally cry he pulled. Collapsing on top of Sams body Colby screamed into his chest. The sound of the heart monitor going flat echoing in his ears until he felt a cold breeze fly past him. Hearing doctors walk in Colby only gripped Sams dead body closer, the man from earlier giving Colby a sad look.

"I-I'm sorry sir, he's gone" wheezing into his baby's chest nothing mattered to Colby anymore. Not money, not friends, not family, not living. He just wanted to roll into a ball and shrivel up like Sams roses. He wanted to sit and rot like the leaves of the flower and die slowly as they did to.

He wanted to be a red ruby rose, shriveled from hoping to long, and now thrown away along with Sams life.