Avenoir || BTS

16

"You're more help than you think you are, Y/N," he smiles. 

It's the night before my cousin's wedding, and the nerves are getting to me. I sit in the living room, where four more are lounging on the couch. 

"You're nervous," Jimin notes. 

"Mm-hmm," I nod. 

"Why?" Yoongi asks, setting down his phone. 

Namjoon pops open champagne while Jungkook sets down a few champagne flutes. 

"I want to go to my cousin's wedding, but my mother will be there." 

"What happened between you two? If you don't mind me asking," Hoseok says. 

"Well, I sinned," I sigh bitterly, "I fell in love with a woman." 

"Oh," Jungkook frowns. 

Rather awkwardly, he pats my head, as if trying to comfort me. 

"Is it her? Your neighbor?" Jimin asks. 

"Yes. Yes, it is."

"But now that your mother is out of your life, you can be with her, can't you?" Namjoon suggests. 

The atmosphere is similar to being entrapped with a gang of therapists. 

"I can't," I reply, "It's not that simple."

"Look, we can be together now," I force a smile, although I'm dying on the inside. 

I have no one to call 'mom'. I push away the harsh words she spat at Vera, hating how helpless I stood when the fight happened. 

"You could have fought harder," Vera says, holding my hands. 

"I know," I reply, "But it's not like I lost you, right?" 

"You didn't," she smiles. 

She pulls me into a hug as I begin to sob. I have her. I only have her. And no one else.

But I did lose her. In a matter of months. 

"I can't be with you anymore," she says. 

"What? Stop joking," I laugh. 

She's the only person I have left. I pushed away my friends to be with her. I gave up my family. I have nothing. I have no one. 

"I'm serious. I can't... I really can't be with you. It's stressful. I'm always worried whether your mother will come back to hurt you, to hurt us. Isn't she right, though? When she said we'll always have to fear being judged? That we can never be happy in this world?"

And just like that, Vera left. But she never truly did exit my life. She would hesitate, come back to me, and leave. And we'd make the same mistake again and again until I started to hate her. Because each time she left, she took away the hope I had saved. 

"I'm sorry to hear that," Namjoon says. 

For some reason, whatever he says gets on my nerves. I remember how uncaring he was, how cold his gaze always seems. And now, his words don't seem heartfelt, and that's the last thing I need. 

"Are you really?" I snap.

"What is that supposed to mean?" he snorts, "I'm not allowed to feel compassion?" 

"I don't know. Aren't our lives a drama to you?" 

He doesn't reply. 

"I'll come with you," Yoongi offers. 

"To... the wedding?" I ask, a bit hopeful. 

"Yes, I'll accompany you," he repeats with a reassuring smile. 

"I'm coming too! Don't leave me out," Jimin chimes. 

Once again, a palpable tension floods the room, and I'm surprised by the gaze Namjoon shoots me. A warning. And even more shocking is the brief vision that flashes. It's me, again, but I don't recognize myself. 

Black swirls trail up my neck, a tattoo I don't currently have. I'm wearing a grey low-cut tank, and black denim shorts, my lips painted the darkest shade of red possible. I sit on the armrest of the armchair, leaning into Namjoon's present form. That is not me. But suddenly, I smirk before I'm gone. 

"What did you see?" Hoseok asks. 

"Nothing important," I brush it off, "How do you guys know when I'm having a vision anyway?" 

"Your eyes turn grey," Jimin replies. 

"They do?" I frown. 

"It's pretty scary if you ask me. You kind of look like those wretched water-wraiths."

"Water-wraith?" I repeat. 

"They live in lakes or ponds, eat seaweed and fish, have pointed teeth, grey skin, and long black hair. Their most distinguishing feature is their striking grey eyes. They love drowning people once they're close enough, and they make the wickedest bargains," Namjoon explains. 

His annoyance is gone now, replaced by an almost youthful joy of sharing knowledge. I can see the Namjoon he used to be, and it makes me regret lashing out earlier. And yet, I don't apologize. 

I can't sleep the whole night, and I have to get up. It looks like all the vampires are resting today, as most of the lights are off. It's quiet, too quiet, like the very walls and halls of the house died. It's no use trying to walk silently, as they can hear me anyway. 

I walk down the halls, finding my way to the one room Yoongi told me not to enter. I wait for a few heartbeats for someone to come stop me, but no one does. Maybe everyone is out tonight, and I'm all alone. 

I suppress my shivers at the thought of being all alone in a mansion in the middle of the forest. 

"Yoongi!" I call out. 

No response. 

"Jimin! Jin," my voice lowers to a whisper, "Jungkook?"

No one is here. I push open the door, flicking on the lights. There's nothing right about this room. And like it had been waiting for me to arrive, a vision starts to play.

Namjoon sits at the table, anger painting his features. 

"What the fuck do you think you're doing?" he asks, clenching his fists on the table. 

The wood groans, bending under the pressure of his hands, but he carefully restrains his power. Yoongi sits casually at the other end, absolutely unbothered. 

"I'm doing what you taught us. We should have learned our mistake from Ida, and from James," he speaks. 

His voice is low, hard to hear. 

Who is Ida? 

"There's nothing much that can be done, is there?" Namjoon sighs, suddenly going lax, "And certainly not what you think of doing."

"Just consider it as me nipping the bud. If the girl falls for me first, I can lead her on, pretend I like her back. It will help her work, and I can also have some fun with it."

His smirk is so vile. It's poisonous, treacherous, and has me seething in anger. 

"What if she refuses to work for us, as Ida did?"

"That's simple, Joon. I'll just pretend to not care about Helen. It'll get the other girl out of the picture. She'll have no one to be jealous of."

Namjoon sighs, resigned. 

"Do whatever you want. I can't stop you. Just make sure Y/N doesn't find out."