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36

"It's for your own good."

"You know we can't," Yoongi says in a deadly calm voice. 

"Where... where would I even go? Do you want me to just..." I start to stutter, tears starting to gather in my eyes, "Up and leave? Just survive?"

"You have to leave in three days. That's all the time we have. I've transferred money to your account. Book a flight to whichever country you want. And don't even let us know where you are going," Yoongi orders. 

And just like that, he gets up and leaves the room. 

"Jordan's just one person!" I yell after him. 

"Y/N..." Taehyung sighs, holding my hand. 

"Do I have to go?" I ask him. 

"Yes, there's no other choice."

It's Namjoon who answers. He leans against the bookshelf with crossed arms, eyes downcast.

"But that doesn't mean we want you to leave. Sometimes, you have to let go of the people you cherish to keep them safe," Jimin says. 

"I don't want to be safe. I want to be with you."

"Quit it," Hoseok snaps, again, "We're really just trying to keep you alive."

"Hobi," Jungkook warns.

One look at him, and I can tell there are tears in his eyes too. He sniffs quietly and quickly looks away.

"Look, you're human. You will move on, Y/N, whether you like it or not. Even if you think it's impossible, you will," Jin adds. 

Frustrated, I end up leaving the room too, glad that no one followed me. I don't intend to stumble upon Yoongi, but he stands quietly on the balcony, merging into the inky night. 

"I thought you'd left. Like, teleported," I say quietly, about to leave him alone. 

"Why would I? I don't have much time left with you," he says. 

"Don't say that," I reply immediately. 

I walk up to him. He moves, catching my wrist and tugging me closer to him. 

"It's a struggle," he whispers, tucking a stray hair behind my ear, "To keep you safe? Or keep you with me?"

"Why not both?" I ask, "There are seven of you."

" Jordan is not our only enemy," he says, "Being with us is a death wish."

"And?" 

"And?" he parrots, a small smile on his lips. 

"I don't want to survive, Yoongi. I want to live."

"That's why we're sending you away," he frowns. 

"Ugh," I groan, "I don't want to live for a long time. I want to live to my fullest."

"What happened to the little old Y/N who always played safe?" he asks. 

His hands are distracting, starting to move up my hips and gathering the silk with them. 

"She met all of you," I answer. 

I'd anticipated it, yet it startles me when he crashes his lips on mine. There's an urgency in his movements that feels so unlike him. He's everywhere. Hands gliding over the smooth silk, leg shoving between both of mine, cool skin brushing against mine. And gradually, the pace slows. 

And even so, he's still everywhere. 

"Yoongi," I whisper against his lips, as he unhurriedly traces the shape of my lips, "I'm not leaving."

"Hmm," he hums, pecking my lips one last time before pulling away, "You're a lot of trouble."

"Yeah,"  I laugh, "I know."

"I wouldn't have it any other way."

"So... I get to stay?" I ask. 

"I'll see what I can do. Hoseok and Namjoon think it's too risky to keep you with us, which I agree with. But what's the point in keeping you safe if you're not happy?"

 "My point, exactly," I sigh, "Look, I know you're worried. If something happens, I will leave ASAP."

"We won't let you go."

One would think, with all the trust I've lost and gained, that I'd be a bit smarter. Then why am I sitting at the airport three days later, crying my eyes out and wondering where the hell everything went wrong?

Yoongi had everyone convinced that I could stay. But I'd left the house for an hour. A very small, seemingly inconsequential hour that would turn into my hell. I wanted to apologize to Soo for not attending her birthday party and spend quality time with her. 

That was all. 

Then why did Jordan appear while I was coming back? Why did he try to hurt me? Why did he succeed? If it weren't for Namjoon swooping in, I wouldn't be alive right now. If it weren't for the immediate venom I was given, I wouldn't have survived. 

The decision was made in split seconds. It was final, and I knew it. I had to book a flight, and I chose to go to Japan. 

Absentmindedly, I touch the faded scar on my wrist. Jordan attacked. Just the way he said he would. And I had to leave, just the way I said I would.

If I could kill Jordan, I would. I'm not such a nice person. And I am certainly not nice to the people who are not nice to me. Nausea slowly builds up inside me until it's overwhelming. I guess it's not nerves. 

I race to the bathroom, head spinning and heart burning like acid pooling in its chambers. What is wrong with me? I wretch, the humid air doing nothing to help me calm down. And my head spins more as I watch thick, red blood leave my mouth. 

Choking a cough, I pick up my phone. I have to call someone. My fingers slip across the screen, but I manage to find a name.

Calling Jin...

"Y/N, we told you to dispose of this phone-"

"Hey, I don't feel too-"

I pass out.