Avenoir || BTS

27

It's my fault for running into the arms of a man who just cried over another woman.

When will I get my voice back?

It's my first demand as soon as I get back to the penthouse. Jimin is tense, and even without his power, the others know something is wrong.

"That's what I wanted to tell you," Jin starts, "Levi has found Jordan, but Jordan is making a fuss about giving your voice back to you. He agrees to give it back on one condition. That he gets to talk to Yoongi."

Great. Yoongi will disagree.

I'm out of here. I found your Helen. I'm not getting my voice back. I'll deal with things on my own.

"Wait, wait," Jin says, grabbing my wrist, "Calm down. We will get your voice back for you. While you were gone, we talked to Yoongi. He agreed to talk. And..." he pauses, eyes searching Taehyung's guilty face, "You found Helen?"

"Yes. Well, no."

As Taehyung explains the situation, I take that chance to shut myself in my room. I have no luck, do I? I want to get out. Alone. I take my phone out, sending a message to James.

Me:
You asleep?

James:
Nope.

Me:
You said you once wanted to kidnap me. Can you do that favor for me now?

James:
Idk. Helping a damsel in distress isn't my strong suit.

Me:
I'm not a goddamn damsel in distress. Far from it, really. I just need a drink.
Or two.

James:
I get what you mean. Those damn vampires don't know shit, do they? They act all strong and mighty, but they have no idea what they're doing. You'll need a lot of patience.
And yeah, a drink too.

Me:
So...?

James:
Get ready.

I throw my phone on the bed, getting into a pair of ripped jeans and a t-shirt. I look pretty okay. I just want to get drunk. I'm not even trying to impress myself tonight.

I'm aiming at disappointment, and I'm already halfway there with the shit Taehyung pulled. I can still feel the ghost of his fingertips on my skin.

I snap my bracelet on, the one that nearly killed me, the one my mother gave me. It should be okay if I wear it for just a night. Yoongi did say it's fine for a short time.

The doorbell rings after a while, grabbing my attention. I walk out, tilting my head as Jungkook opens the door.

"J-James?" he stutters.

The other three perk up, about to crowd around the door, until I push Jungkook aside.

"I'm here for her," James snorts, "You boys are dumbasses, you know that? You're doing a good job-" he pauses for emphasis, "-at making her miserable."

I smile to myself, shoving my phone in my purse as I follow James.

"Wait, you can't-" Jungkook tries to stop me.

"Oh yes, she can," James steps in, "I'm with her. She's better off without any of you."

Hurt fills Jungkook's eyes, but I don't feel the least bit sorry. I'm tired of being disposable to them. Once I get my voice back, I'm leaving. And maybe I'll even leave the country. There're too many bad memories tied to this place.

Maybe I'm running away, but sometimes it's better to leave while you can than try to brave it and make things worse. James takes me to a bar, true to his word. Despite being nearly 2:00 a.m, it's still pretty full.

"Here, take this," James says, handing me a small bottle of perfume, "Lilly of the valley essence. It works against most supernatural beings."

I nod in thanks, waving him goodbye. It's easy to avoid people. I'm barely noticeable, and I look like I just had a bad breakup, shooing away anyone who might have wanted to approach me.

Five shots in, the room starts to spin. I shouldn't be too reckless. But try telling my inebriated self that. She thinks it's a good idea to let myself go.

"Enough."

I jump when I hear Yoongi's voice. My eyes can't seem to focus on anything, so it's hard to tell whether the blur of pale skin is Yoongi or a cat.

"What the fuck?" I mumble.

Startled, I touch my throat, sobering a little. Just a little. How can I talk?

"Y/N, look at me."

Easy for him to say. Okay, I wasn't hallucinating Yoongi. He sits before me, his posture heavy as if he'd just lost a battle.

"What? What do you want?" I ask, "How did I get my voice back?"

"I talked to Jordan. Just ... go back home, Y/N. I'll take you back."

"No," I shake my head, swirling the vodka (a bad idea) in my glass, "I'm not your plaything."

"You're not."

"Is that what you think, Yoongi? Is it, really?"

I slam the glass on the countertop, startling him. The bartender looks over, wondering whether to interfere or not.

"Alright, you're too much," Yoongi scoffs.

"Excuse me?"

"I'm tired of your pity parties. Every time something doesn't go your way, you don't try to talk it out. You don't try to figure out what's wrong. You just escape. How is that going for you?"

His words are a bitter pill to swallow, and I hate that there's some truth to his words, however harsh he is.

"You're drowning in yourself. You assume things will not work out without even trying. You think nothing will ever go right for you. You're as pessimistic as me, and if I had to take a guess, you'll end up being an asshole like me in the future. But of course, you're the seer. You would know."

"Shut up," I say in a tiny voice.

"No, I won't. You need to hear this. Get your shit back together. You're falling apart. Taehyung told me what happened. Did you ever think of talking to him about it, perhaps? Or letting him speak about it? Instead of getting flat-out drunk?"

I stay quiet, much like a child getting reprimanded.

"You may be the heroine in your story, Y/N, but so is everyone else in theirs. You need to consider others' feelings as well, before doing something rash. And that's why we're so similar. We hurt others to protect ourselves. But it comes back to bite us. Now, come with me. You don't have to talk to Taehyung. It's your choice. I'm just telling you to think about it."