My SpaceHey Kitten: A Riddlebat Story

Chapter 4: Don't Cry over Spilled Chocolate Milk (emotional)

I slammed the door to the Batcave entrance emotionally. I DROPPED ALL OF MY LUNCH! INCLUDING THE CHOCOLATE MILK! Black tears streamed down my face just like when MCR broke up. I cried for MCR but not my parents, if you didn't know they were dead. My eyeliner wasn't waterproof. It looked more emo and edgy that way.

"What seems to be the matter, Master Bruce?" Alfredo asked.

"I lost my lunch while doing epic parkour," I growled back. I was doing parkour the day my parents died. They are dead if you did not know.

He paused. "Well, why don't I fix you a new sandwich and milk and bring it to you while you work?"

I took a seat at my computer. "Alright," I mumbled. I did have some work to do, unlike my dad. He was going to be mayor but he's dead. I checked Reddit, specifically the r/riddler subreddit. I frequented Reddit a lot, unlike my parents who no longer can (they're dead). There were a ton of new posts since I last checked — none from my parents of course since they are dead. They all had something to do with his latest twitch stream and... milk? I noticed some of the screenshots attached. My jaw dropped. It was MY chocolate milk that I had dropped. I immediately opened my instant messages on SpaceHey.

"i heard what happened on your stream today. what are you going to do?"

"Honestly, Emo Lord, I haven't a single clue," he instantly replied. "I've embarrassed myself in front of my followers who had expected a leader out of me. I've let them all down, but I need them for my revolution".

"maybe you could go live again and explain that you're sorry and that the movement will continue as planned"

"An apology stream? Perhaps... that is a good idea. But I can't just let Batman get away with this. He started a war. I'm going to publicly reveal his identity to Gotham"

I began to sweat. He's going to expose me and ruin my life, I thought. What could I say without making it obvious that I am Batman?

"i'm not batman but if i was i would think that's a bad idea because what if he's some really famous guy everyone loves? that would only make him more popular right?" God I was so good at being undercover.

"You make a good point. I need that vigilante ruined. Permanently. I know how this master plan ends, and I'm going to take him down with me. Would you like to hear my newly formulated plan?"

This was it. I was going to easily evade whatever revenge plot the Riddler had for me once he told me. I was eager to reply until a familiar light took the sky. I winced. I couldn't keep abruptly ending my conversations with the Riddler every time Vengeance was needed. And Alfredo wasn't even done with my sandwich yet. Then I heard police sirens. It was a regular sound of Gotham, but this time it was louder than usual. Uneasy, I threw on my suit and followed the trail of police cars to the crime scene.

It was the mayor's penthouse. An officer, Jim Gordon, escorted me inside. It was clear that I wasn't welcomed here. Awkwardddddd. Like I would always tell my butler, no one ever understands me.

I froze when I saw "NO MORE LIES" scribbled in red ink on the deceased mayor's duct tape- wrapped face. So this was the Riddler's doing. That was his status on SpaceHey. God, this guy was a total freak.

An officer inspected an envelope that was addressed to... me? Well, The Batman. There was a card inside with an encrypted code and a riddle: What does a liar do when he's dead? He lies still.

I stared at the mayor's son, who was in the apartment. At least he wasn't an orphan. Not like it was a competition or anything, but I was an orphan (if you didn't know), so BOTH of my parents were dead. Officer Gordon arranged another investigation tomorrow that I would assist on. I began having increasingly less time to chat with the Riddler. I almost worried that he would suspect that I was Batman, though I hadn't given him a single reason for him to think so.

Alfredo greeted me once I entered the Batcave. He was holding my new sandwich and a glass of chocolate milk, but I didn't care. The crust was still on anyway. I didn't think that the Riddler would actually MURDER someone. Deep down I knew that this was only the beginning. Gotham could only rely on xXDark_Knight_Emo_Lord_69Xx now, if only they knew of my work on SpaceHey. I needed more information about the Riddler's true identity.

"Your PB and J, sir," Alfredo reminded me.

"I'm busy," I grumbled.

"If I may–" he started, picking up the encryption from the crime scene.

"Can't you just leave me alone?" I snapped. "I was supposed to stop the Riddler, but I just let him murder the mayor!" I punched a hole in the wall next to the old one from when I raged- quit Fortnite.

"This city is turning to anarchy," I huffed between breaths. "Maybe the Riddler's right. This city can't be saved. Only fear can save us now."

The butler left without saying a word. He left the sandwich and milk behind on my desk. I opened SpaceHey.

"why would you kill the mayor?" I asked.

"Where were you? Why did you leave in the middle of our conversation? It's a common occurrence. I need to know that you're dedicated to this movement".

"i just need an explanation. i need to understand. give me a reason to keep following you. I don't even know who you are".

"Then let me tell you about myself to convince you that you can trust me. Me? I'm nobody. Just someone society has forgotten about. I grew up from a seed... tough as a weed... But in a mansion, in a slum... I'll never know where I come from".

"you're an orphan too?" If you didn't know my parents were dead. This nerd clearly had a thing for riddles. I still needed to know more.