I Wish That I Had Jesse's Girl

5 - Thoughts and True Feelings

(CHLOE'S P.O.V) **This takes place one week after Chloe left the hospital**

Friends.

That's all we will ever be and I guess I will just have to live with that.

When I was back at the hospital, I remember waking up to Beca holding my hand. We had a small conversation after I had woken up, but she never once let go of my hand.

I heard my door open and looked up and saw Aubrey walk in. She had some food with her. She came in and sat the food down on the nightstand beside me and climbed into bed.

"Chloe, sweetie, you need to east something." She said laying right in front of me.

"I'm not hungry."

"I don't care if you aren't hungry." Aubrey said giving me a look daring me to argue again.

I knew she was right. I sat up, and she handed me the food. As I slowly ate she told me about her day to try to get my mind off of everything. It worked for a little bit.

After I finished eating, I laid down onto my bed again, but this time when Aubrey joined me, she wrapped her arms around my body and I rested my head on her shoulder.

This position wasn't awkward for us, we used to lay like this all the time before she and Stacie got together.

We laid there for quite a while, she gently stroked her hand up and down my back and would occasionally run it through my hair. Then suddenly I heard Aubrey whisper breaking the silence, "Everything will be okay Chloe."

A small tear escaped my eye. I missed spending time with Aubrey, I understand she's busy with Stacie and having a girlfriend takes time to put effort into. But sometimes I miss just us hanging out.

"Thank you Aubrey."

"You don't have to thank me, I'm your best friend it's my job." I chuckled a little after she said that.

We laid there for a little longer, before I pulled back to look at her. "Hey did you ever find my note I left? By the bridge?"

"Yeah, I gave it to Beca since it was addressed to her." She said that as if it was no big deal.

I began panicking now if Beca read that note that she knows how I feel about her. "What? No no no. Did she read it?"

"Yeah I'm pretty sure-"

Oh my god Beca knows.

Leaving that notes going to ruin everything between me and Beca. She knows how I feel. I didn't think that I would be alive had she had gotten it.

I couldn't face her now.

I felt as if my heart was being torn into two over and over again. I quickly pulled my self out of Aubrey's embrace and tried to run out of the apartment.

"Where are you going?" I heard Aubrey shout behind me.

"I'm sorry Aubrey, I just can't be here right now." Before she could answer I slammed the door shut and ran away as fast as I could from our apartment. I could hear Aubrey trying to chase after me but I was too far ahead.

(BECA'S P.O.V)

"Hey can we talk?" I said as I got to Jesse's dorm.

"Oh no, that's never a good sign." Jesse said with a little chuckle, letting make into his dorm.

I smiled sheepishly at him as we both sat on his bed. "Listen Jesse, you're my best friend and things between us are great but-"

"-But your heart isn't in this relationship." He said finishing my sentence for me.

I looked at him and smiled sadly. "I'm sorry Jesse."

"Don't be you can't help how you feel. We gave it a shot and it didn't work out." He said. "Beside you're still my best friend Becs. I'm surprised we lasted this long."

I looked at him surprised. "Really?"

"Yeah, I've been waiting for you to figure out your feelings for Chloe for a while now."

"You knew?"

He laughed a little and said to me, "Honestly Beca you aren't that subtle."

"If you knew then why didn't you say anything?"

"Because you had to figure it out for yourself. Beside's if we are being honest here I guess I have something to confess as well." 

"You're gay?"

"What? No." Jesse said.

"Well I wasn't sure I mean you are a guy and you're into a capella so..." Jesse then lightly hit my arm.

"Shut up Beca." He smiled before looking at me and said. "I may have feelings for someone else or rather another Bella."

"Who."

He looked sheepishly and said "Aubrey-"

"Aubrey?" I said raising my voice in shock. "Aubrey Posen, my captain Aubrey?"

He nodded. "But you hardly know her?"

"Yeah it's probably more of an infatuation or a small crush." He said, "I don't know what it is, her being in charge and in control is really hot and gets me-"

"Okay I don't need to hear anymore out of you." I said covering my ears.

"Alright I'll stop talking. Beside's it's not like I can do anything about it. Isn't she seeing someone?"

"Yeah her and Stacie are dating."

"Yeah so there's nothing I can do. But you can, you should do something about your crush on Chloe."

"Dude I can't we like just broke up a minute ago. That wouldn't be right, I can't do that."

"But you didn't love me Beca. You just told me earlier that you were in love with Chloe this whole time. No worries if you're scared about hurting me, cause you won't. I want you two to be together."

I was shocked "So you are okay with this?"

"Yeah, just as long as we can still be friends."

"Of course" I pulled him into a small hug "Thank you, Jesse, for making this easy."

He pulled away slightly and grabbed onto my shoulders, "Your welcome. Now if I were you Beca, I would go and find Chloe and talk to her."

"But-"

"No buts Beca, if that note was complete honesty, then she feels the same."

"Okay," I then turned towards his door, but before exiting I turned and said something else. "And thanks again, Jesse."

"No problem."

And with that being said, I left.

+++++++

I was excited. I was finally going to be able to tell her how I felt. I wouldn't have to hold it in anymore.

I was no longer scared, I wanted to be with her. I so badly wanted to be with her. I am almost one hundred percent positive that she likes me back. I could feel myself beginning to get giddy. I can't wait to be with her.

I was about halfway over to her apartment when I had gotten a call from Aubrey.

"Hello?"

"Beca! Oh, thank goodness you answered." I could tell something was wrong, she sounded nervous.

"Is everything okay?"

I heard take a deep breath before she answered. "It's- It's Chloe"