I Wish That I Had Jesse's Girl

18 - Fights ands Regret

If any of you just wanna talk or something, you can always just message me.

(AUBREY'S P.O.V)

"Well I was just wondering... if when you get back from the trip with all the Bellas, you would like to go out on a date with me? I really like you Aubrey and just think about it, we would be the perfect couple."

"I-" I was shocked. I didn't know how to respond to that. It took me a second to process that, I thought that he had a toner for Beca. Not for me.

"Come one please? Just give me a chance?"

I decided to think about it for a minute before responding. I mean, it's not like Stacie actually likes me in that way and is going to ask me out. "I'll go on a date with you." I just need to get over her and move on.

He eyes opened wide when he heard me say that. "Oh my gosh, I never thought you say yes to me. Umm, how about instead of waiting until the trip is over, we go out tomorrow night instead?"

Oh I was supposed to go over to Stacie's tomorrow, but I'm sure she will understand. "Okay."

"Alright, so I'll pick you up around seven?"

"Yeah, sure."

He stood up and had a big smile on his face. "Thanks Aubrey, for ahh... giving me a chance." and then he walked off.

+++

"Hey Aubrey!" I looked over and saw Chloe coming towards me, dragging Beca behind her.

"Yes?"

"I saw you talking to Jesse what was that about?"

"Well we were just talking, and than he asked me out on a date."

Just as Chloe was about to ask me something Beca cut her off and said, "Did you say yes?"

"Well yeah." Both there faces seemed to drop after I said that.

"Beca, I'm gonna talk to Aubrey for a minute, will you excuse us?"

Beca just shook her head yes, than Chloe just pulled me off into the Trebles house, upstairs and into a bathroom.

"Oh my gosh, Aubrey! Why did you say yes to Jesse? I thought you had feelings for Stacie?"

I let out a frustrated groan. "I do have feelings for Stacie, Chloe. It's just..." I said trailing off.

"Just what?"

"I don't know, I mean..." I let out another frustrated groan. "Do you actually think she would like me back and would say yes to going out with me?"

"Yes, I actually do."

"You're just saying that." I said getting frustrated. "Why do you care so much anyway?"

"Because I know you don't like Jesse in that way and are just using him as a distraction from Stacie. I don't want you to lead him on and than hurt him Aubrey."

"Oh please, like you actually care how Jesse feels." I said with a scoff.

She seemed to be taken back by that. I could tell she was getting mad. "Aubrey, you know I do care about how he feels, I-" Than I cut her off.

"Chloe, you had a crush on his girlfriend, for god sakes! You-" Than she cut me off. "Aubrey, I tried killing myself so that Beca and Jesse would both be happy. You can't bring this back on me!" she said putting an emphasis on there names.

"Chloe, you tried killing yourself because you thought nobody needed you!" I was starting to raise my voice now. "And guess what, you were right! I don't need you Chloe and nobody else does!"

Oh my god. I immediately started feeling guilty. That was way out of line. "Chloe, I'm sorry, I didn't mean that." I said trying to apologize but she just cut me off. "Aubrey shut up!"

I couldn't believe I just said that. I look up at her face and see her eyes filling with tears. "I need to leave." She says her voice cracking.

"No, Chloe please. I need you!" I say to her as she opens the door and leaves I follow her out into the hall way and yell her name to try and get her to stop, but she just keeps walking away from me.

I fell absolutely terrible. I just walked into the bathroom and just started crying into uncontrollable sobs.

After about 10 minutes, I pulled myself together and quickly left the party. I walked over to my car and quickly called Stacie.

"Hello?" I heard Stacie say answering the phone, her voice sounding a bit scratchy but I ignored it.

"Hey, are you at the party?"

" No I'm actually, in my dorm." I heard her say and also hearing some coughing in the background.

"Do you mind if I come over?"

"Why? Did something happen?" she said with concern in her voice.

"Kinda, I just need to talk to someone."

"Alright."

"Okay, I'll be over in five." I said getting in my car and driving over towards the dorms.

(CHLOE'S P.O.V) *This starts from right when she left the bathroom*

I heard Aubrey calling my name, but I just ignored her. How could she say she didn't need me?

I mean, she wasn't wrong. Nobody really does need me.

All these negative thoughts just kept coming back into my head as if I were relapsing. I felt my arms begin to burn, I needed to cut again.

I wiped the tears from my eyes and quickly ran downstairs, trying to get out of the house as quickly as I could. I had almost made it to the front door when I heard Beca calling my name.

I stopped for a second, but just kept going. Beca didn't need me, no one did.

Unfortunately I couldn't stop thinking about are relation ship and realized that she is only with me because of pity. I mean, who would want to be with the girl who has all the scars and who has tried killing herself. God, how could I be so stupid to actually think Beca would actually love me.

As I got outside I heard her call my name again. I tried ignoring her, but I felt her hand on my shoulder spinning me around.

"Chloe, what the hel..." She said angry but softened when I turned around. "What's wrong? What happened with Aubrey?"

"Nothing, I just need to be alone right  now." I said turning back around and walking away from her.

"Chloe, please tell me."

"Beca just leave me alone! Please." I said not turning around.

"No Chloe, I love you and I want to-"

"Beca just stop!" I said turning around to face her, she doesn't really love me. She's just giving me false hope again.

"No Chloe, not until yo-"

"I hate you, Beca. God, I hate you so much. You don't know when to leave do you? I just want to be alone Beca!"

I knew I shouldn't have said that, but really, what does it matter anymore. She never really needed me all those times she said she did.

I hated seeing the look on her face. "Y-You don't mean that? Do you?" When she said that her voice became very small and had a sad tone to it.

I wanted to tell her that I didn't and that I loved her, but I couldn't. She just doesn't feel the same back. "I do, I hate you Beca."  I said than turned around and started running.

I was heading towards Aubrey and I's apartment when I realized cutting wouldn't be enough. I quickly changed my direction running for the bridge.

I felt no point in living anymore, just like Aubrey said no one needed me.