Heart of Diamond (Heart Series #5)

E I G H T E E N

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I will always choose you

Warning: R-18

Maluha-luha akong nagpahila sa kanya. Hindi maalis sa isipan ko ang sinabi ng Mommy niya. I couldn't help but imagine Simour with Shanty. I know it sounds silly but I find them looking good with each other.

I never want to be a hindrance of his dreams. I know exactly what he wants. Alam kong gusto niyang mag-architect at mas malaki ang opportunity na makukuha niya kung sakaling mag-aaral siya abroad. It's never a mistake to dream big, but it's a mistake to not have your dream on your palms.

I know that I shouldn't feel jealous about him being with Shanty. As long as he would remain faithful to me, I would understand him. Alam ko rin naman na magiging faithful sa akin si Simour but I know as well that it would be difficult to engage in a long distance relationship.

"S-Simour, why don't you just study abroad?" Paos kong tanong.

There's still time for me to stop him from making this decision. Alam ko ang tama sa mali. And I know pretty well that letting him go will definitely bring him somewhere where he could be contented with life.

Kita ko ang agad niyang pagbuntong-hininga. Napaangat ang mukha niya sa langit saka tila ba naiinis na nilingon ako. Kunot ang noo niya, magkasalubong ang mga kilay at bahagyang umiigting ang mga panga.

But with the livid expression written on his face, he still didn't let go of my hand. His hands are still as tight as a snake's hug.

"Huwag ngayon, babe," aniya sa paos rin na boses.

Alam kong nahihirapan siya. Alam kong mas nahihirapan siya kaysa sa akin. Who wouldn't be if his choice is to stay with me and have his dream slip away or to grab his dream and risk our relationship?

Napakagat-labi ako saka hindi napigilang takpan ang mukha ko. Agad na nagsituluan ang mga luha ko.

"S-Simour, I don't want you to waste more time!" Hagulhol ko. "We only live once! So go on and chase your dreams!"

"Hindi mo ako naiintindihan, Primmly Athena—"

"Ano ang hindi ko naiintindihan? Sige, sabihin mo sa akin ang hindi ko naiintindihan!" Humagulhol ako lalo. "Simour, I am not dumb! I know what I am doing! I know what I'm saying. And I want you to choose your dream rather than choosing our relationship—"

"Huwag mo akong utusan, Primmly Athena." Sa kabila ng galit niyang mukha ay nagawa niya pa rin na palambutin ang boses niya. "Alam ko ang ginagawa ko."

Akmang magsasalita akong muli nang bigla kaming nakarinig ng mga tunog ng sapatos palapit sa amin. Agad kaming napalingon sa kinaroroonan noon. Only to see his mother together with Shanty walking towards where we are.

My heart hammered. I no longer want more confrontations. I only want what's right, what's peace and whatever is best. I don't want his mother to let him choose between Shanty and I.

"SJ, I am warning you, right now." His mother's voice thundered in the silence of the garage.

Maliit man siyang babae pero dahil sa awra niya ay talagang mapapaatras ka. She's so like my Mom.

Muling napabuntong-hininga si Simour. I could feel how tired he is at the very moment. Ayokong dagdagan pa. I am willing to let him go and take risks. In this lifetime, it isn't about holding on in your relationships, this is about stepping up and embracing your dreams. Sometimes in life, you have to sacrifice one thing to grasp what you want to fulfill.