Unfathomable Desire

Chapter 13

I woke up to Mack starring at me. She sat on the edge of her bed, facing me.

"What the fuck, Mack?" I said, sitting up.

Mack continued looking at me, chewing her bottom lip.

"What's on your mind?" I asked her.

She looked down, clearly contemplating what she wanted to say.

"Just say it, Mack," I pleaded.

"Where were you last night?" she asked.

I sat at the edge of my bed to better face her. I rubbed the sleep out of my eyes.

"What do you mean?" I asked her, yawning.

"You told me you were coming back here last night," she said, her tone neutral. "I got back later that night and you weren't here. Did you think I wouldn't notice?"

"I tried going to bed," I made up excuses as I went, not knowing what I would say next. "I couldn't sleep because I felt like you were mad at me so I took a walk."

"I waited up for you, y/n. You didn't come back for hours."

I hated lying to her, she was my best friend at Hogwarts and I felt guilty hiding so much from her.

"I walked around for a while," I told her. "I ended up sitting outside to read and lost track of time."

Mack started chewing her lip again and I could tell she was holding back.

I sighed. "Mack," I said, "Whatever you want to say, just say it. You're my best friend, let's just be open with each other." I was such a hypocrite.

"When I saw you last night with Professor Snape," at the sound of his name, my heart started beating fast and I grew anxious. I tried keeping my facial expression neutral, aloof. "It just seemed like I had walked in on something I wasn't supposed to."

"That's crazy, Mack," I said. "We were talking about an assignment."

"Y/n, he was smoking in front of you, you have to admit that's weird."

"I guess so," I said, not knowing how I was going to get out of this one. "I think he was stressed, I don't know. But I promise you, nothing happened last night."

"It's not just last night," she said. "For a while, every time you came back from seeing him, you were angry."

"Can you blame me? He can be an ass sometimes."

Mack started chewing her lip again, clearly deep in thought. I decided to give her some truth, hoping the vulnerability would make her let it go.

"Can I tell you something that you can't tell anyone?" I asked her.

"Of course," she said, her attention now fully on me.

"I'm serious, Mack, not a soul. It's embarrassing."

"Cross my heart," she said as she made a crossing motion with her finger over her heart.

"At the beginning of the semester, I sort of had a crush on Professor Snape." I paused, waiting for her reaction. Her eyes grew wide and she opened her mouth to speak, but I continued before she had the chance. "I knew nothing could happen between us, obviously, he was my teacher. I think I just saw his incredible talent in potions and that attracted me to him. I tried to see him as much as possible. Then I saw how much of an ass he was, and he constantly bullied me like all other students, so I lost interest."