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The smell of bacon woke me up that morning. I checked the time and it was much later than I usually got up but I was not even worried. I took a long shower and got dressed for the day. I had my pinafore in case we were going to the homestead.

"Oh you're up. Good morning Mamakhe." I put my hand in front of his face to stop him from kissing me. "Nope. You did not sleep in my bed last night I don't know where your lips have been." He laughed and wrapped his arms around me. "I've brushed my teeth and rinsed my mouth thoroughly." I playfully rolled my eyes. "So can I get a kiss?" I shook my head. "Only after breakfast."

We went downstairs and to my surprise all of the wives were seated at the table. If one of them try to attack me this time I'm punching back. "Good morning." I mumbled and they mumbled back. The only seat open was the furthest one away from my husband. He and MaCele were sitting at the heads of the table. MaKhumalo was sitting to his right with MaCele's mother next to her. MaGumede was sitting to the left of Baba, MaMlambo was next to her and I sat next to MaMlambo. There was an empty seat with no place setting in front of me and that's where I was staring the whole breakfast.

After breakfast we were waiting for MaKhumalo's assistant to arrive so I went to go and do the dishes that everyone just left. "Oh, here you are." It was MaLanga, MaCele's mother. "I was going to wash those." I really wanted to roll my eyes. She couldn't even greet me the other day now she wants to make conversation. "No it's fine ma. I'm almost done." 

"Are you okay? Mbali said you had a headache last night." Why did she have to tell everyone. "I'm fine, Ma. I just needed some rest." She just nodded. "Oh, here you are. Baba was asking about you. Don't worry, you didn't miss anything. Everyone is sitting in awkward silence on their phones." And what was I supposed to do? Join them?

"Okay, um the dishes are done. I didn't mean to overstep I just did them out of habit." She smiled. "No,you didn't overstep. Thank you for doing them. I'll pack them away but first let's make tea." I helped her with the tea and followed her lead. I took my seat again and drank my tea silently when all of a sudden we heard a high pitched scream.

"Hi!" A short skinny man walked in with a bunch of bags. He was wearing a purple suit and his makeup was so good it was even better than MaKhumalo's. And her makeup was always done perfectly. "Oh, boss I've missed you! I've been stuck in the office with old white men. How could you do this to me?!" He complained dramatically. "Hi to you too Lutho." They hugged and she introduced us to him.

"This is my amazing personal assistant Lutho.  Lutho these are my sister wives MaCele, MaMlambo, MaGumede, and MaBhengu." I just nodded in response. "There's so many of you." He said more to himself. "Okay, I've brought the shoes and the tops. I hope everything fits.

We were each given a couple of black tops to choose from and a pair of white converse. I fit mine in the room and when it fit perfectly I changed back into my normal clothes. "MaBhengu, I wanted to see which top fits." MaKhumalo complained when I came back down. "Both of them fit and so does the shoes." She just sighed and I saw her assistant look at me weirdly.

"Is all of that real?" I was confused. "I'm a gay man but with an ass that voluptuous, a waist that small, and a face that pretty I'd want to fuck you too." I choked on my own spit. "Lutho!" Baba's voice roared. "I'm sorry daddy." What the fuck? I couldn't help but laugh as he bit one of his fingers and batted his eyelashes.

"Lutho, we've been over this. Stop calling me that." He batted his eyelashes harder. "What?" He asked innocently. "Lutho." Mbali said shoving him. "Fine, if you don't want me just say that." He said dramatically. "I don't want you. I tell you this every single time." Baba said and walked away. "He's just playing hard to get. He knows he wants me."

We gathered up the kids and walked to a neighbor's house. She sold traditional clothing. "Everyone is going to be wearing red. We're looking for yellow. Beadwork with a lot of yellow in it as well as yellow isicholo." The lady showed us the beads and we picked out a few. "Oh yes, we also need the long pleated traditional skirts." She brought everything out.

"MaBhengu can't wear these skirts. She's hasn't actually gotten married yet." MaGumede said and anyone who looked at me could tell I was visibly annoyed. "But Lobola was paid. She's Baba's wife." MaCele said and they started arguing with each other. "Okay! Okay! Wait!" The lady shouted. MaKhumalo stood with her head in her hand.

"If Lobola was paid we can say she's a fiance. Which means she doesn't wear the long black skirt but she still covers up. Your colour is yellow so she'll wear a pleated traditional skirts that's yellow." They seemed to be fine with it. "Wait. The skirts that the maidens wear?" The lady nodded. "Yes but ending at the knee. I don't have one in yellow but my neighbor who also makes them does. She also had the kiddies skirts for the girls. Now back to the hats. I only have three yellow hats. They're about the same size, then a bigger size in black, and a small one also in black. I suggest the first wife wear the big one and the last wife wear the smaller black one. The only other hats I have are red."

They agreed and we fit everything. Her neighbor came with the yellow skirt. Her biggest one was short because my ass was so big and MaGumede insisted on video calling Baba to get his permission to buy it. "Luckily Ma was also there and confirmed that it was culturally appropriate. We got all  of our beads and then walked back to the house.

The fight and noise started when we got home because everyone forgot what they chose and it was all mixed up. It was so loud that I went to sit outside. "Mamakhe." He took a seat next to me and we cuddled in the sun. "You keep disappearing on me." I sighed. "I'm not disappearing on you. I'm disappearing on your wives." We laughed. "I miss home." I confessed. This is one of the longest times I've been away. "I do too. MaKhumalo got you something that she didn't want to give you in front of the other wives. He handed me a box and I saw a phone on the front.

"It's the latest model. Let's go upstairs and set it up." I rolled my eyes. "You're lying. You want to do other things." He kissed my neck. "So? It'll need to charge first anyway. We can go in by the back and sneak upstairs." The wives were still fighting and didn't even notice us. I put my new phone on charge and we got to it. We were laying on the bed naked and out of breath. "We need to get down there before they kill each other." I groaned but we got dressed. I made sure we both looked alright and he went downstairs first.

The shouting died down and I went downstairs. "Oh here she is. So you just decided to run off with my husband while all of us are fighting." I rolled my eyes. "You mean our husband?" MaCele stood behind MaGumede smiling at me. "Oh, you have an attitude now?" Everyone in the room started walking closer. "No, I've just had enough of being walked over." She scoffed. "Little girl when we met you were a sidechick and a maid no less. You have no say here." It was my turn to scoff. "You're here by default sister. What did you do? Stab a few holes a condom and poof! A ring." She charged for me but MaCele and MaMlambo held her back.

"Okay, okay, stop it! I've had enough! From now on there will be complete silence!" He shouted. "But Baba it's MaGumede. The rest of us are trying." MaMlambo complained. "You're a traitor! Any other time you would've been fighting this bitch with me!" MaGumede yelled at MaMlambo. "Shut up! I said silence! If one of you embarrass me this weekend I will rethink my divorce rule! Do not try me! Now take your things and go to your houses!"

They left and I was relieved. The day of the ceremony came and we were running late. Baba had to leave without us to be part of all the rituals. Even though I hated these women I helped them with their hair and makeup. While others helped all the girls get ready. We were late but still had a whole photoshoot before we left.

I kept to myself throughout the ceremony. I wished I was in the mood to dance and celebrate with everyone but I really wasn't. "I've been looking for you all over. Why are you hiding here?" I sighed and he hugged me. "Here you are. We're taking more pictures. Come!" We took more family pictures. I made sure to get some pictures alone with baba because I didn't really have any.

I felt much better after hearing my aunt's voice. I called her and she cheered me up just a little bit. I danced with the others until baba called me aside and we went to sit on the hill. "I know you don't celebrate your birthday but I git you a little something. He opened a velvet box showing me a diamond bracelet. It took my breath away. It was so beautiful. He put it on for me and the stones shone under the moonlight.

"Happy birthday Thandi."

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