Red Hot! (Sebastian Vettel)

40. "Let Me In"

Libby took a sip from her cup of coffee and switched her laptop on.   Today was her first day back at work since the confrontation with her father and Scott in Austin.  They had now moved onto Mexico, and after Mike had insisted she had the Thursday off, she had now returned ready to forget all about the chaos her life had descended into and concentrate on the job she was being paid to do.   It  had happened. There was nothing she could do to change that now.  In fact she felt proud of herself, proud that she had stood up to her father like she had done.  He was pathetic, he was weak and she was determined that she wasn't going to waste any more of her life thinking about him.  Scott...well he was a completely different matter. 

Despite the harsh words he'd spoken to her, she really felt for him.  He'd discovered all that he'd grown up thinking was true was nothing but a charade.  The sisters he'd thought didn't want to know him hadn't been given a choice in the matter.  What did she do? Did she get to know him? Or had too much water passed under the bridge?  She knew she had to talk to him.  She'd avoided all phone calls since Austin.   Scott had tried calling her several times, had indeed had Seb.  She knew she wasn't being fair to Seb.  He was worried and she was shutting him out,  but this was something she needed to deal with herself.  It would be all too easy to give in to her emotions and let Seb comfort her but she had to be strong and stop relying on him.  Her love for him was playing on her mind since she'd admitted it to herself.  Was she willing to risk their friendship on the off chance that he loved her too?  She honestly didn't know.  If he gave her a sign, any sign, then she would tell him,  but she just wasn't sure. 

So since Austin she'd distanced herself from him.  She'd answered his texts, reassuring him that she was coping ok, but she had refused all his attempts to meet up.  She really needed the time to herself to think about what she was going to do.

There was a knock on her door.  "Come in," she called out.  The door opened, and to her surprise Scott walked in, shutting the door behind him.   He looked at her apologetically. 

"Libby, please can we talk? There's things I need to say."  Libby thought about telling him to leave. Was she really ready for this conversation?  She knew it had to happen at some point but was she emotionally strong enough right now?  "Please Libby."  He sounded so upset, so desperate.  She nodded.  She had to at least try.

"Take a seat," she said.  Scoot sighed and sat down. He looked at her, she stared back. Neither wanted to look away first.  Finally Scott looked down at his hands that were resting on his thighs.

Libby, I am so sorry.  I really can't tell you how sorry I am for the way I spoke to you, for believing the worst of you.  Please, I'm begging you to forgive me.  I believed him Libby, because he's my dad, and despite how he treated you and your sisters, our sisters, he was always a great dad to me.  He's always been there for me, and I believed him without a single trace of doubt in my mind.  I'm so, so sorry.  Please tell me how I can make this right."  Libby's heart ached.  It ached for the years she and her sisters had spent knowing that their father didn't love them, that he'd given all of his love to their half brother, to this man sat there before her now with tears streaming down his face.  She'd been jealous of him, she'd resented him but he was as much a victim of Drew McDevitt's selfishness as they had been, he'd been denied the chance of knowing his sisters.  He'd been brought up an only child, without the love she had shared with her siblings. 

"Scott," she began.   "It's not your fault. He made his choices. He has to live with them.   I spent so many years beating myself up.  Was it my fault somehow that he'd left? But I've realised something, it wasn't my fault.  Or Emmie's, or Sadie's or our mum's.  It was his fault.  And it's not your fault that he loved you.  I shouldn't judge you on the crimes of our father.  I forgive you."