Arranged love - jaylor AU

closure

- taylors pov - 

Watching Lilly do her thing is one of my favorite things to do. She is getting good at figure skating and today she has a private lesson. Now she skates 3-4 days a week depending on if she wants the fourth day or not. But she does take one class with other kids and have two privates. The fourth time is the open rink where everyone that's a paying member can come and practice, she likes to do that on Saturdays. I'm not one to push my child to be the best at this sport, but I am here to support her if this is what she wants to do. She is only 8 years old, so I don't want to push her into something that's too much for her. 

Right now, she is in this harness thing to learn a jump. They have been working on it off the ice on Wednesday so today she is doing it on the ice in the harness. I don't get to watch every time she is here, but I try to come as often as I can. It's important for her to see me here and involved in her stuff, and I love to watch her. Even when she is across the rink, and I can't see her eyes I know they are sparkling. 

«I thought I might find you here» a voice I know all too well comes from my left, Jake. «You're not allowed to be here» I respond without even looking at him. if security wasn't close by, I would panic more, but they are a few meters away keeping eye on me and Lilly. Before Jake can reach me, they step between us. 

«Mrs hilton, what do you want us to do» my personal security guard Joshua asks me while keeping his eyes on Jake. «Stay close. But he isn't stupid enough to harm me when there are two armed bodyguards next to me. At least I don't think he has grown that stupid over the years» I say, and they let him come closer. I turn on the bench to finally face him but glare at him to silently tell him to keep space between us on the bleaches. 

«What do you want Jake» I sigh. After the meeting we had I hoped he would take the hint and back off for good, but clearly, he didn't give up. The desperation and determination he has isn't appealing at all, I'm more embarrassed on his behalf if I'm being honest. I've made myself clear, the contract is crystal clear and airtight, but still, he won't give up. If I was him, I would back off with some sense of dignity left, but I guess we are different in that sense. 

But I can't help but feel a tug on my heart seeing him up close again. No matter how much shit he put me through, he was also my first love and that means something. It was hard for me to admit, but I understand where Joe was coming from now when Bianca has been bugging us. When you see someone, you loved once you do remember the good times, even if the relationship crashed and burned. I resent Jake for what he did to me, but I'm also thankful that he did the right thing with signing away his rights to Lilly. He might have been a gaslighting and shitty boyfriend, but he did the right thing for the life we created together. As much as I hate how he treated me I will forever be grateful for him creating Lilly with me and then realizing that he wanted to let go of the responsibility because he didn't want to be a father. I would have resented him, and he would have resented me, if he stuck around and was forced to parent. He always said he never wanted kids, that's why I don't understand why he all of a sudden takes an interest in Lilly. 

«I wanted to find a way to see my daughter» he sighs as he sits down and look out on the ice. It's not hard to spot her because there are only two kids on the ice, but the other one is much older than Lilly and has her own coach. My little girl is out there with her pink attire, sparkly gloves and in the harness practicing her jumps. 

«You do know that I can call the police right now because you have no right to be here. You have no right to show up and certainly no right to see her» I'm getting pissed off, but I try to stay calm. The last thing I would want is to create a scene and have Lilly see that something is going on. She made herself crystal clear that she didn't want to see or speak to Jake, and I'm in total agreement with that. Seeing him will only bring negativity because he isn't her father. He might have his genes in her, but that doesn't make her his daughter. I've tried to tell Jake that in all the ways I can, but he seems like he isn't even hearing what I'm saying.