Forbidden Things || Cobra Kai

75 You're My Love, My Death, My Alibi

The hospital was a little cold, but not unlike how Hawk remembered it. He kept his eyes forward as he walked through the halls, but occasionally looked to check out the numbers on the door to make sure he was going to the right place. He didn't want to see the professionals hiding their looks of pity from him. When the receptionist asked if he wanted an escort to the room, he'd said he could get there on his own.

He felt awful for not coming sooner, but he'd been ruminating over a lot of the stuff that had happened. However, no matter the reason for his absence, he still felt as if he should have been one of the first to come see Penelope.

She was his girlfriend after all.

He stopped in front of the door to her room, staring at the numbers on the nameplate for a long time. 115, he was in the right place, but the number wasn't just the room. It seemed to know that she was the only one of them, out of both dojos, that was still fifteen. One-Fifteen.

Or maybe he was thinking too much into it.

He carried a medium-sized, round flower pot. It was pink - because what else would it have been? - with bright red vervains sprouting from the opening. He hadn't just gone out and bought her a bouquet of flowers, he'd brought her the whole fucking plant. It was heavy, but that wasn't a problem for him, not that he cared. He'd carry anything to her if he had to, anything for her.

He walked through the open door without further hesitation, getting a small feel for the room as he walked over to her bedside. The table to the left was mostly taken up by cards and little gifts, evidence that others had come to see her with their well wishes.

There was a small vase holding wildflowers and even a few branches off of some trees, a tag hanging off one stem bestowing Tory's name with her littler brother's. It was a sweet gesture, picking flowers as opposed to buying them, but he knew Tory couldn't afford to pay for a bouquet and that was why they were hand picked, probably from a park or something. Beside it was a handmade card, obviously done by her brother, that said Sorry you're unwell. It was thoughtful for someone who had probably never met Penelope.

Hawk gently moved some of the cards to make room for his flowers. They had a sweet aroma and if she could sense it, he wanted it to be close to her so she could smell them.

"I'm sorry I didn't come to see you before now," he said, staring at the flowers. He sighed, finally looking over to her soft, still face. He longed to see her smile. "I wish I had a reason why, something I could tell you that'll explain it all, but I don't have an excuse."

He pulled the chair closer to her bedside and sat down, then took her hand into his to hold firmly. At least she was warm in the hospital's cold, sterile environment.

"And I'm sorry I wasn't there to protect you," he continued, squeezing her hand. "I should have been there, by your side the entire time. It wasn't your fight, you shouldn't have gotten pulled into it. Now you're here and I feel awful..."

He stopped, unsure if he wanted to share all of his guilt with her. If she could hear him, he knew she would tell him it wasn't his fault. She'd say it as many times as he needed to hear it, sure of herself that he wasn't at fault for what happened. But as he stared at the bright white bandage around her head, keeping the wound underneath from getting infected, he wasn't so sure.

There were a million things he wanted to say, but he had no idea how to say them. He was sad to know she was stuck in such a state, but angry that no justice had been served for what had brought her here. He wanted to detest and badmouth Robby Keene for what he had done, but at the same time he couldn't bring himself to do it. He wanted to scream and get out all his frustrations, but he saw no point in being loud when he could take everything out in the dojo. It all built up inside of him, everyday, and as much as he could, he went to the dojo to let it out on a punching bag or in a sparring match.