Chasing Admon Damien

Chapter 38

Hindi din naman nagtagal masyado ang usapan. Dalawang oras lang at umalis na din sila. Hindi na din nila ako niyayang umuwi na, they might be thinking we still have so much to talk about. Hindi din ako nag-aalala sa trabaho ko kahit hindi pumasok dahil sinabihan na ako ni tito na mag-usap muna kami ni Adam. And I don’t think I can work properly right now. I am so grateful to tito because he felt what I wanted without asking it.

Ngayon nga ay ipinasyal ako ni Adam sa waterfalls ng kanilang lupain. Honestly, I miss this place so much. It has a very special place in my heart because it became a witness to our love story.

We rode Phoenix together. Masaya ako at maayos pa din palang naalagaan ng mga katiwala ang kabayo niya. It had been years that he didn’t come home.

Tinulungan niya akong bumaba mula sa kabayo. He shamelessly wrapped his hands on my waist to put me down. It seems like yesterday that we were here.

Parang ang mga pagsubok na dumaan ay isang masamang panaginip lamang. Parang hindi nangyari ang lahat. Now that I am looking the love and compassion in his eyes. Nothing changed. The way he looked at me before is still the way he looks at me now. There is love, passion and gentleness.

Pagkababa niya sa akin ay hindi pa din niya ako binibitawan. Oh, I love how close we are. It's the feeling I longed to feel. I longed to feel his love again. I longed him to see me this way again. 

He is seriously staring at my lips and I can't help but bit my lower lip.  Then a soft smile plastered on his lips.  "As much as I want to kiss you now, we  still have so much to talk about, baby." 

I pouted my lips. "Pwede naman, eh!" I whined.  Gosh, Ava! Sobra mong ipinahahalata na na-miss mo siya!

Nagtaas siya ng kilay. Doon pa lang ako parang natauhan.  "Pwede kitang halikan, ngayon?" 

“Y-yeah." I managed to say.  There is a ghost of smile in his lips but trying to be serious. 

"Nah. I think I won’t be able to stop if I kiss you. Hindi na tayo makakapag-usap. I don't want that. I want to make things clear now. I want to ask questions and  I think its the same for you. I know you have lots of questions, too, baby." 

I nodded disppointedly. Mas lalo lang lumawak ang kanyang ngisi.  Inalalayan niya akong maupo sa  damuhan. Kahit medyo mataas na ang sikat ng araw ay hindi naman mainit dahil malilim sa dami ng mga puno. The trees grew taller and wild flowers are still everywhere. Napakasariwa ng hangin. The audible sound of the falling water from the falls is so alluring and captivating.

“What do you want to ask?” he asked first. His face is so serious now watching me.

Napakunot ako ng noo, nag-iisip ng mga  itatanong sa kanya. Now that he’s here, parang nakalimutan ko na ang lahat. Parang ang lahat ng dahilan ng aking pag-iyak ay nawala na parang bula.

“W-why does your mother hid to you about us?” I asked after some time.

Tumango siya bago ako sinagot. It seems like he’s  expecting me to ask about this. “When I woke up from the hospital and remembered everything, I asked her that. I was so mad. I was so mad because she didn’t tell me the truth.” Bumuntong-hininga siya bago muling nagsalita. “Mama told me that when I woke up in the hospital, ikaw agad ang hinahanap ko. But headaches come frequently kaya tinuturukan ako ng kung anu-anong gamot. The pain is unbearable. Nang magising ako mula sa pagkakatulog, wala na akong maalala. Mommy tried to tell me about you kaya lang ay mas lalong sumasakit ang ulo ko. Mas madalas at mas grabe. My condition was risky. Kaya nagdesisyon si mama na ilihim ang lahat ng tungkol sa atin.”

Tigagal ako at hindi makapagsalita, pilit ko pa ding pinoproseso ang sinabi niya. Hindi ko alam na sinubukan ng mama niya na sabihin sa kanya ang totoo.  Kaya ba ganun na lang ang galit niya dahil nakita niya ang hirap ng  pinagdaanan ni Adam?  Alam ko naman na iyon kaya lang ay iba pa din kapag may kumpirmasyon.

And nothing changed, I still understand her. I know she just did what she thought was right for her son. 

"How about Katrina? Why are you engaged, is that because of your mother, too?”

"Mama wanted me to marry Katrina,  instead but I didn't agree with her. Siguro gusto niyang kalimutan na talaga kita but it won't happen. Yes, my mind forgot about you but my heart doesn't.”

Napasimangot naman ako sa kanya dahil sa kanyang sinabi, hindi naniniwala.  "How so? You were so strict and snob when  you saw me. Halos lumabas na ang puso ko nang makita ulit kita pero ikaw parang wala lang." 

He chuckled a bit at my reaction.   “What do you want, to tell you I like you then when we just met? I don’t know if you’ll believe this but  I was your prisoner the first time I laid my eyes on you. My heart beat doubled when you beautifully entered my office.”

I smiled a little. “So, your feelings for me was… real? A-akala ko kasi hindi mo ako ganun kagusto.”

His eyebrows furrowed and his expression became darker. “Hindi ka ba naniniwala sa lahat ng ipinakita at ipinaramdam ko sa iyo? True, I’ve lost my memory but my heart recognized who owned it.”

I am so overwhelmed. I am teary-eyed and happy at the same time. It was my dream. A dream that I nearly gave up. No, I gave up. But, God is good to me because from all the pain I bear and for all the struggles that I conquered, he brought me back the genuine happiness I thought I had lost. A real happiness I thought I would never feel again.

“I have loved you long ago, hindi ko alam na mas lalalim pa pala iyon. Those accidents proved me that whatever happens, my heart will only beat for you.”

My tears are continuously falling. He moved closer even if we’re already so close with each other. Parang ayaw niyang may espasyo sa pagitan naming dalawa.

He gently wiped my tears. “Please, do not ever leave me again. The accidents brought to me were all pain but you leaving me is the most painful and hardest thing that happened in my life.”

Marahan kong hinaplos ang kanyang mukha habang bumubuhos ang aking mga luha. Ang sakit makita siya sa ganitong pagkakataon. Hurt and pain were all over his face. I don’t want to tell him that I don't  regret the things that I did because all those sacrifices were all for him.

I am so lucky that his love for me was pure. Hindi niya ako binitiwan kahit bumitaw ako. Dahil akala ko masasaktan ko siya lalo pero mas masasaktan pala siya kapag nawala ako sa buhay niya.

Our life is not a fairytale but I always dreamed us having a happily ever after. He is my prince who never let me go. He is my prince who is ready to get hurt just he would chase our love.

Iyon ang sinabi ko noon. That I will chase for our love but I gave up so easily. He didn’t. And he found our love back.

“I’m sorry for giving up on our love and I really am sorry for hurting you.”

Inilapit niya ang mukha niya sa akin at marahan akong siniil ng halik. It was so magical and overwhelming. Us being here in a fairytale-like land and promising how much we love each other.

I kissed him back with equal passion. His kisses deepen and I didn’t care if I am running out of breathe.

His hands went up to my nape and pulled a handful of my hair. I let him to give him full access of my lips.  Then his lips moved down to my neck, gently biting it. I am trying to suppress my moans but couldn't when his lips went to my ear. Hindi ko na mapigilan ang mahinang pag-ungol. My moan is so flirty and womanly that I didn't even recognize  my own voice. 

Napakapit ako nang mahigpit sa batok  niya nang nagsimulang maglumikot ang kanyang dila sa tainga ko. Mas lalo akong nawala sa sarili nang naramdaman ang kanyang kamay sa isang dibdib ko. I am still fully clothed but I can feel his hand in my bare breast. He gently massaged it and my head fell back because of different  sensations it sends me. 

Bumalik ang mga labi niya sa labi ko. His tongue is exploring all the insides of my mouth. His other hand was in my breast massaging it while the other one went to  touch my lower part.  I moan so loud when his fingers brushed my sensitive flesh. Napakapit ako nang mahigpit sa batok niya at tumigil sa paghalik sa akin. He is watching my reactions and I can't meet his eyes when I am so horny like this. Hindi pa siya nakuntento at hinawi ang aking panty para makapasok ang kanyang daliri. Napasabunot ako sa kanyang buhok nang    ipasok niya ang isang daliri. He gently pushed it and I was out of breath.

The moment he moved his finger, I am already hyperventilating. I feel so exposed even when I am still fully clothed. One more pushed and I am moaning with ecstasy. I feel myself reaching the most delicious feeling.

“Ah!” I felt my own release. Nakaramdam ako ng panginginig ng katawan kaya mas lalo akong kumapit sa braso niya. That was so hot. I am catching my breath when I looked at him. His eyes pictured with burning desire. Para akong nalulusaw sa mga tingin niya.

Muli niya akong hinalikan sa mga labi, hindi ko pa man nakakalma ang sarili. It was just a very quick kiss. He kissed my temple and fixed my dress. He pulled me closer and I leaned my head on his broad chest. His feet are in my sideways, caging me. He is embracing me from the back.

“You still have questions, baby?” His voice is deep and husky and it turns me on. Fuck! At hinahabol ko palang ang hininga. Hindi pa nakatulong na nararamdaman ko siya sa likuran ko.

“Why, why didn’t you…” hindi ko maituloy.

“Why, you want to do it here, baby?” his voice filled with amusement.

“W-we did it here before, so…” I bravely said, nakatago naman kasi ang aking mukha sa dibdib niya.

“You will be naked and I will push too hard on you, baka masugatan ang likuran mo.”

Oo nga, noh?

Pinamulahan ako ng mukha. Napaghahalataan, Ava, ah?!

“We’ll do it in bed.” He kissed my neck. I can feel that he is smirking, though.

“Bed lang?”

Iniharap niya ako sa kanya, he made me look at him but I can’t look straight in his eyes.

“In the kitchen, in the living room, in the pool, kahit saan wag lang sa damuhan.”

Ngumuso lang ako at hindi na nagsalita at baka kung ano pa ang masabi ko na naman sa kanya.

Humalakhak naman siya ngunit nagseryoso din. “Tell me everything that happened to you years ago.”

Alam ko madami siyang gustong malaman sa akin. Sa nakaraan. Huminga ako nang malalim bago nagkwento sa kanya. “I woke up from a coma in the hospital. I didn’t know I was in a hospital bed for six months already. Mas lalo pa akong nagulantang nang malamang nasa New York pala ako naka confine.” I paused a little bit to find the right words to say. “At nalaman ko nga na namatay ka mula sa aksidente. I mourned. Para na din akong namatay. Sobrang sakit. Naisip ko noon hindi ko kayang mabuhay nang wala ka kaya hindi ako umuwi ng Pilipinas. Hindi ko kaya.” My voice broke. Nangilid ang mga Iuhang kanina ko pa pinipigil. Naramdaman kong humigpit ang yakap niya sa akin.

“Pakiramdam ko hindi ako makakaahon mula sayo kapag ginawa ko iyon. Kaya nang gumaling at uuwi na sanang Pilipinas, I’ve decided to stay there. I chose a busy life to get you out of my mind. Nagtatrabaho ako habang nag-aaral. I funded my own studies and I lived there alone. Doon ko nakilala ang mga kaibigan ko. You’ve met them already, right?” I turned to asked him that and sweetly smiled at him to make this lighter but his face remained humorless.

Isa pa, nakaramdam ako ng ginhawa habang kinukwento sa kanya lahat. It’s as if a burden in my chest now lifted. “They helped me recover. And then, time came that I am so full of mommy’s rants and beggings to make me home. I resigned at TCD and Mr. Thompson recommended me to your company.”

Tumigil ako at tumingala sa kanya para lang ngumiti at tignan ang ekspresyon ng mukha niya. His face is dark, his jaw clenching while watching me. Parang lahat talaga ng sinasabi ko ay pinapakinggan niyang mabuti at sinusukat.

“When I saw you so hot standing in your office, I nearly fainted. Akala ko ay hindi ikaw iyon. But when you faced me and I had the full view of your face, hindi ko alam ang mararamdaman. Masaya ako at buhay ka ngunit gumuho ulit ang mundo ko nang hindi mo ako makilala. Masakit. But that time, I had decided to get you back. To chase our love. That I will do everything for you to love me again and to remember me. But, I gave up so easily. You chase our love, instead. You didn’t give up on me. That made me love you even more. I thought I have already loved you at the highest point but no, I loved you deeper and I don’t think I will ever love a man again.” Mahina akong humalakhak. “Well, not if that is our son-

Hindi ko na naituloy ang sasabihin ko dahil hinalikan niya ako sa mga labi. It was just a simple kiss yet full of love. Nakadikit lang ang mga labi namin at hindi gumagalaw.

“I love you so much. And yes, I will forever chase our love. Because living without you is lifeless. Kung may maipagpapasalamat man ako sa lahat ng pagsubok na nalampasan natin, iyon ay ang ginawa niya tayong matatag. Whatever struggles we will be facing in the future, I know we’ll overcome it together. I trust you and I trust our love.”

Inilayo ko ang sarili sa kanya upang matitigan ang mga mata niya. His eyes shout sincerity, hope and happiness. From the start, I was right for choosing him to be my other half. He’s God’s blessing to me and I’ll forever thank Him for giving me a man like him.