sola
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I'm still at a loss for words when all of the sudden Sunwoo's legs give out and he's on the floor.
"Oh my god," I gasp. I kneel next to him and I make sure his heart is still beating. Luckily, it is so he's just sleeping from drinking so much.
I don't know what the hell he just told me, or what he wants me to say. I don't know anything at this point. I just want to be alone. but when I look at him he's still my best friend, and he always will be. He tried to shut me out once when his dad left, but it'll never happen.
I grab his arms and I drag him out of the crowd and thankfully nobody steps on him. Sunwoo stirs in his sleep and I make an attempt to wake him up but he's passed out by now.
I stop for a second, contemplating what to do because my arms and legs are already aching.
"Need some help?" Hyunjae jogs over and I nod, not looking him in the eye.
He doesn't ask any further questions though, he just grabs Sunwoo's ankles and we bring him into the classroom we set our stuff in.
I kneel next to Sunwoo and I drape a blanket over him. I sigh, remembering how we used to be. Always just friends, always there for each other. I guess I got too selfish.
I stand up and I catch Hyunjae watching me carefully.
Miji's words seem to replay in the space between us, and I know what he's thinking. I want to explain it to him, but I'm afraid. I don't want to relive that.
"You don't have to say anything," He says quietly. "But if you want to, I'll listen."
I don't know what I was expecting him to say, but it was definitely not that.
"And... and what Miji said, that doesn't change that night during the ski trip. In case you were worried about that. I know it was still a big deal for us, and nothing can take away from that." Hyunjae says.
I burst into tears.
Not just soft, quiet crying, but full on bawling. I don't know if I've ever cried so hard in front of someone. I collapse on the floor sobbing my eyes out, and I feel Hyunjae sit next to me. He places a hand on my back and I just cry harder.
Because I don't deserve this. I shouldn't be able to be ignorant toward what my best friend was feeling, and keep secrets from Hyunjae, and he still is here. he still cares.
Hyunjae wraps his other arm around me and after a while I settle down. I have to face reality for what it is.
I take a deep breath. There's so many things I want to say.
"I was a virgin," is all that comes out of my mouth and I internally slap myself.
out of everything, that's the one that got chosen to say??
Hyunjae's lips twitch but he doesn't smile. "Okay," He says.
"But also I... please don't tell anyone what I'm going to tell you." I say. "I hate that by the time word gets around the story is completely twisted."
"I won't," Hyunjae says. "And also who would I tell?"
I nod. I take a deep breath and then I bring us back to the first year of high school. "My friend was getting involved with a teacher. He was a young teacher, new to the school from that year.
Anyways, I knew it was getting too far, it was so bad that they were meeting up every Friday after school in his classroom. So one day, I stayed in the hallway. I was planning to just talk to my friend after she came out, and try to convince her it was wrong and they should stop.
