In the end, it's only us (Natasha x reader

My temporary home

Five weeks after Y/n fell through the portal

Y/n pov

I'm currently occupying a room at the West residence, as i have for the last week. They thought it would be better than the lab and i agreed. But with every cell in my body wanting to sleep, even though i don't need to, it won't let me even. My own body has created a double moral against me. It won't let me eat but tells me it's hungry, it won't me sleep but tells me it's tired, it won't let me think but gives me trails of thoughts every new second.

So now i'm sitting in the living room, curled up in a armchair while playing monopoly with Barry, Joe, Iris and Wally. Caitlin has just left, she was more there for me.

"Oh come on, you're cheating" Wally exclaims as i roll a six and land on free parking, for the fourth time. I laugh as i gather the money once again and lean back in my chair.

"How does one cheat with dices in a boardgame?" i ask with a smile but know exactly how, since that's what i did. Not too often, but here and there to bring myself some luck on the board.

"Are you sure you're not a metahuman?" he asks and i see in the corner of my eye how Barry freezes and Joe looks down on the floor. I place a hand on Barry's leg as he's sitting in the chair next to me to tell him it's okay as i answer.

"Wally, i assure you that i'm no metahuman who can control dices" and i pass the dices to Iris on my other side. "But that would be cool. If i had that power, i would take you'll to vegas"

"Maybe you can anyways" Iris mutter under her breath, maybe not aware of that i can hear her. I let out another small laugh and she realises i heard and she rolls the dices. The game continues until i win, Iris comes in second of course. The boys accused us of cheating, cause you know, girl power and stuff. But me and Iris laugh it off as i take off the blanket Barry had wrapped around earlier.

"What happened to your neck?" Wally asks out of the blue and my hand instinctively goes up to the, not yet fully healed, wound that stretches from my left shoulder and over the bottom of my throat to end at the right shoulder. Also knowing the similar wounds around my wrists, but those are more healed and wrapped in bandage. But the one over my chest was to complicated that they could't wrap it in any way that wouldn't effect my movement. The portal had somehow cured me of the venom and healed parts of the wounds, but the they will still leave large scars.

"She was in a accident not that long ago" Barry answers for me as i realise the question had made me lose my voice. I had been told that Wally wasn't aware of what was going on and that i wasn't supposed to tell him, but since he only got here yesterday. We haven't really had time to talk about WHY i lived there. "And she's staying here as she recovers, then she'll go home"

"Why not in a hospital, like now offence Joe, but this place ain't that sanitary" Wally says and i smile as i wrap the blanket around me again. Joe doens't take offence but only laughs it off and leans back with an uncertain smile towards me.

"I hate hospitals" i answer and it's not a lie. I have my reasons. Reasons i still had when i worked in a hospital. "I'm tired, i'll see you all for breakfast. Good night" and they say goodnight back as i walk up and into the guest bedroom. It's like i'm living on autopilot as i take off my clothes and put on a small top and shorts. But i don't get to that part as i catch my reflection in the mirror. Surgical scars from when Caitlin removed every shard of glass stuck in my abdomen and back. She only removed the stitches yesterday and now they look like year old scars. To think that one night can bring more scars that a hundred years have.

A comfort washes over me as i imagine Natasha kissing every last one of them, dragging her teeth over them and telling me how hot they look. Of course that'll be after starring at them and maybe crying for what i've been through. But after that, ever time i try to cover them up or am ashamed of them. She'll pull me down and bring me out of it, telling her that she loves them because they reminds her that she's got me back alive. That the scars show that i made it through. But my comfort disappears as the door opens and then quickly closes, then instead there is a knock. So i pick up the shirt i had just thrown off and pulls it over my head to let it cover my chest and stomach before i answer the door.

"I'm sorry, i should have knocked first" Barry apologises with a sweet smile.

"It's okay Barry, it's your house" i open the door to let him in and he comes in. Handing me a new shirt in the process.

"I finally got all the blood out of it and got it fixed, i hope you don't mind it having some pink thread instead of black" he explains as i look at the shirt, little pink sewn parts here and there. As i see what shirt it is i can't help but let a tear fall and hug it, then i speed and hug him.

"Thank you Barry" he says and hugs me back.

"You're welcome, Y/n" he says as i let him go. I gesture for him with my finger for him to turn around, but i'm sure he can see me in the reflection of all the mirrors in the room. There are a lot of them, but i don't mind. They had used this room as a storage room before. I throw off the shirt and pull on the ACDC t-shirt. Letting it fall down to just above my knees.

"I don't think you understand how much it means to me that you fixed it, even though it was with pink thread" i laugh out as he turns around.

"I didn't really have any other thread, Caitlin let me borrow it after she fixed the pink shirt she wore... that day" he didn't need to mention that 'that day' is the day i woke up and threw her through a glass wall. "It was hers, wasn't it?"

"Yes, yes it is"

"You know we're doing everything we can so that you can go home"

"I know Barry, it's just that a lot happened that makes me wonder if i even should go home"

"She's your wife, and personally i think that you should get to have more than two days with those titles" he has that sweet smile of his on and it makes me smile as well. "I'll let you sleep, good night"

"Goodnight, and thanks again" i say as he goes out, letting me be alone in the room. I hug myself as i hug the t-shirt. I had worn it that day, i had just pulled on the first thing i found on the floor and that was her shirt. But i don't even think i will re-sew it later to black to remind myself of this time, to remind myself that there are people who aren't afraid of the thing they don't understand. That's the difference between my earth and this one.